Is an emotional connection enough to build a romantic relationship on?

[rayna]

He's become a close friend for the amount of time we've known each other. Ever since we met, I've been in denial of my feelings for him, because I can't quite put my finger on what it is I see in him. It's not his looks...he's okay looking...I'm not sure I can see him sexually. It's not his personality...I find him slightly immature and a bit too carefree about life. It's not his intelligence...he's smart but not a sexy genius.

I just like the friendship/emotional connection we have. I feel safe in his arms. I like the way he kisses me. I like how he holds back from being too forward. I feel comfortable talking to him about my problems/worries and he knows how to help me see things in a different perspective and to make me feel better. He also puts up with all my drama and sh*t... I know he's into me so that's not a factor.

But I don't think our "connection" is enough to build a romantic relationship on....Is it?
I like being with him, and he always leaves me craving for more of him. I'm kind of confused why I feel so connected to him. (I've never been in love before...so idk how it feels). But I fear taking things further because he doesn't meet all the critical attributes I look for in a partner. I do not want to jump in and then end up hurting him!

What do you think?

[pisces25]

I like the way he kisses me.
What do you think?

I think I am confused. You kiss but aren't officially together? That's weird. I would never kiss my male friends in a romantic way. I assume you don't just mean a peck on the cheek when you first see each other or do you mean that?

Anyway, IMO there needs to be a physical as well as emotional connection to build a relationship. I could be wrong but that has been my experience.

[rayna]

I think I am confused. You kiss but aren't officially together? That's weird. I would never kiss my male friends in a romantic way. I assume you don't just mean a peck on the cheek when you first see each other or do you mean that?

No I don't mean a friendly peck on the cheek. I wouldn't say we're just friends...it's kind of a grey area. We've kissed before and talked about dating, but nothing has really changed yet since the talk because we're nearing the crazy busy end of the semester....so nothing is official.

[pisces25]

I dunno I would probably rather feel like I am crazy about someone to have a relationship with them. But perhaps I am too idealistic. If you are even questioning if your feelings are strong enough for a relationship perhaps your answer lies there.

[bulrush]

You named several elements of a relationship:

1. emotional connection,
2. intellectual connection,
3. looks (physical attractiveness),
4. and sexual chemistry.

I think you need at least 3 out of 4 to have a chance, or a little of each. So, date him if you like and find out for yourself. You will never know unless you try.

If you break up, don't consider it a failure. Consider it a learning experience. What did you learn about him? What did you learn about yourself?

[Boisdevie]

There is no easy answer to this because when you embark on a relationship you don't know how things will work out. Will it work? Will it end? Will you or the other party be hurt if ultimately it does not work? A relationship is always a risk BUT it's worth taking the chance because it could be fantastic.
On a personal note my GF initially did not do 'it' for me in all areas but I thought why not take a chance. We've been together 15 months and I love her to bits.