Expressing your feelings to a guy

[starburst]

Ive been reading some posts on this forum and a lot of people have said " don't let the guy know how much you love him". I tell my bf
how much i love and cherish him all the time even though he isn't to open about how he feels and isn't as cheesy as i am.

I just wanted to ask you men/boys/lads (lol) if you liked a girl playing "hard to get"? Ive tried many times to play hard to get but i just
cant..i dont know how to not tell him i love him every second of every moment...

would he get bored of this????


should i stop telling him how i feel??

[smackie9]

Don't worry hun in time the novelty will wear off.....sounds like you are in the honeymoon period of your relationship where you are infactuated with him. Some guys just don't see the point in saying it all the time and would rather show it with their actions, like taking out the garbage for you or wash your car.

[haxan]

It'd probably be more fulfilling and a better match if you were with someone as affectionate as yourself, but you just have to deal with it.

As far as playing hard to get, anyone who I ever thought was playing any type of game when was I dating them got left behind. So I wouldn't recommend it.

As long as you're not coming across as mentally ill or sheepishly dependent, I wouldn't get bored with anything complimentary.

[starburst]

awww thanks for the responses guys ^__^

[moba59]

I think it depends on the guy. With my first relationship, my girlfriend and I said "I love you" every night before bed and several times daily. I grew up with family that stressed the importance of sharing ones feelings, so as long as it's not forced or said for the wrong reasons I think it's good. Don't give in and stop saying it because it's corny. One of the downfalls of my relationship was the lack of communication and therefore the stopping of sharing feelings like that.

[starburst]

thanks moba59 I really appreciated the response and advice :')

[Linerider]

My girlfriend does that to me every day and I really like it, but then I say romantic things back to her as well.

Playing hard to get is what you do when you first meet the guy, and during the first few dates. If you keep playing 'hard to get' during the relationship then he will get frustrated and resentful.
Just make sure you keep him challenged - don't be afraid to make demands of him sometimes and to expect to have your own way now and then.

Also, with the text messages, you need variety. Try sending him a message like "I can't stop thinking about how amazing it feels when you look at me."
or "I'm sitting here at work unable to concentrate because all I can think about is how good it's going to feel when I see you tonight".

[Sixpacj]

Playing hard to get is what you do when you first meet the guy, and during the first few dates. If you keep playing 'hard to get' during the relationship then he will get frustrated and resentful.
Just make sure you keep him challenged - don't be afraid to make demands of him sometimes and to expect to have your own way now and then.

I personally disagree with the above. Admittedly, it may work for some men, but:

- if you play hard to get during the first few dates, you never get another date, or get promoted to relationship status; and

- I disagree about your needing to keep him challenged. In my view, personally, being challenged is what a man does in his professional life, when he comes back home he doesn't want to come to "being challenged".

But overall, I'd say it is fine to express your feelings for a man.

[starburst]

Hmmm i just dont want him to think that i cant live without him (which is true) lol Because he makes it seem like he can live without me...:'(

[haxan]

Hmmm i just dont want him to think that i cant live without him (which is true) lol

We can tell that kind of stuff, so it's pointless to control your adoration anyway. It might be reciprocated, you never know. Some people just aren't verbally expressive in the right way.

[Sixpacj]

Hmmm i just dont want him to think that i cant live without him (which is true) lol Because he makes it seem like he can live without me...:'(

Yeah, that is not a comfortable position to be in... Have you ever though why you can't live without him? Is he the best you could possibly get and you know that whereas he could easily get a similar or "better quality" woman than you? Maybe you should work on yourself in order to boost your self-esteem?

[Linerider]

when he comes back home he doesn't want to come to "being challenged".

So you want to be in a relationship with a women who is a complete doormat then? I've never met a guy in my life who wants to be with a passive women who blindly obeys her partner. It's totally unhealthy and very boring.

[Sixpacj]

So you want to be in a relationship with a women who is a complete doormat then? I've never met a guy in my life who wants to be with a passive women who blindly obeys her partner. It's totally unhealthy and very boring.

What you're saying there is prolly true but has little to do with my post.

You can be a confident, respectful, warm person (woman) and not be a doormat. You are building some ludicrous context here where a woman is either "challenging" or if she isn't, she's a "doormat". You are operating here, IMHO, under the wrong, albeit interesting, assumption that a woman is of inherently lower value than a man. She is then, just by dint of being female, a doormat. And if she doesn't want to be a "doormat" (low value), she has to do something external to herself (challenge the man).

I know it is sometimes difficult to believe but a heterosexual man is attracted to a woman for... being a woman. :-)

[Linerider]

I stepped on a nerve then!

[Sixpacj]

How? Would you mind explaining, pls?