I don't know what she wants?...

[aadharshd]

hey guys, so there's this girl (lets call her T) who rejected me twice but once supposedly had feelings for me. oh and she is also my closest friends and we consider each other best friends so you already know it's complicated. (for any background info on my friendship with her, just click on my name to see my previous posts)

so it's been a while since events have transpired and we talk normally now. suddenly now she comes to me and complains that i don't talk to her enough and that i don't hang out with her enough in person? she also complains that i shouldn't care what my friends think. she even invited me to join her group that helps out the school so that we can more chances to talk. we have a 3 day field trip coming up and she even said she wouldn't mind hanging out there.

normally none of this would be a problem to me but considering my strong feelings for her, i find it hard to hang out just to be friends. i tried to explain this but i don't think she understood it fully. one of my friends says she is into me and another one says just hang out with her if she says so.

what does she want and what am i supposed to do? i know most of you will tell me to stop hanging out with her but i can't because of my feelings. (feel free to say anything bad, its okay)

i feel like such a wuss. am i overthinking it?

[Boisdevie]

Perhaps she likes the attention. Perhaps she wants to control you?
I'd stay away from her.

[smackie9]

If a girl really likes you she wouldn't be "complaining" about you not giving her attention, nor would she suggests just hanging out. If a girl likes you she "hints" to you she wants you to take her out on a date, and they want to be alone with you, not have a bunch of people around.

The only reason she invited you to this group is because she knows if she goes alone, she will be bored out of her mind, so that is why she has invited you along....to keep her company.....just someone to talk to.

Tell her no.

[JoeyJR]

LOL.. i almost ... nvm

stay away from this girl, attention seeking bish.. stop fueling her attention.. etc, she sounds like a nutcase.

[aadharshd]

I appreciate all of your answers regardless of whether you have read up on my background.

@smackie9 : actually she has friends in the group who know me as well. so she wouldn't be bored. and i really need this group thing to fill a requirement for the school (long story) so i can't say no since i need this group activity.

@JoeyJR : LOL its okay you can say what you wanted to say and i don't know if she is a nutcase but you could say quite emotional and can't make up her mind.

and to everyone, i can't actually stay away from her cause we are also family friends and she would just complain again and i don't want to lose a best friend. not to mention i still like her like crazy.

[searock]

i can't actually stay away from her cause we are also family friends and she would just complain again and i don't want to lose a best friend. not to mention i still like her like crazy.

The fact that you still like her "like her like crazy" is precisely the reason you should stay away from her. Surely you can avoid spending time alone with her. I don't think she does it on purpose to complain, she just sounds immature and she probably has never found herself on the other side (having feelings for a close friend who doesn't reciprocate). So she doesn't understand that it's very hard for you to keep being friends with her even though you have feelings for her. You need to tell her that as long as you have feelings, you can't be happy with "just" friendship, and actually being close to her will make you suffer even more. It doesn't matter if she doesn't understand right now, she will understand sooner or later as she gets more experienced in life. After you have explained, start detaching yourself from her, until you reach no contact (apart from possible family gatherings in which she's involved: even then, you can not spend time with her, just say hello).

Detaching yourself is the only way you can truly successfully move on. Assuming that's what you want to do.

[smackie9]

Ya I agree.....she just figures saying no to you is enough for you to shut off those feelings and just carry on being friends.

[Edwardnew]

She wants to rule on you. She is not perfect for you. Just leave her.