Broke N.C - went good! What go do now?

[jcowap]

Basically broke up with my ex about 6/7 weeks ago.
We was only together 3 months and she accidently fell pregnant.
It was her decision to abort and i agreed. The day she got the abortion she went really distant and in the end we finished. I tried my very best to be there for ber but she pushed me away.
It honestly was the best start to a relationship ive ever had - we got on so so well. Our relationship only went sour the time of her abortion.

Ive aways thought we ended because it messed her head up (which it obviously would of done) however my sensible friend said this was not the case. He said we ended because she didnt want me enough which i kinda now agree on. I think ipat the start she did really want me then her feelings changed. Maybe she thought it was all too much too soon and it scared her? Ill never know. She did give me a reason but its complete b***s**t and its obviously not true.

Anyways i didnt pester her or anything when we broke up and up until wednesday we had gone just under 4 weeks n.c. I text her on wednesday a really funny silly very random message and she replied laughing. We exchanged funny random texts. She asked if i was ok and how my holiday was etc and then she didnt reply to my last text (it was late and she always used to randomly not reply claiming she had fell asleep)

Thing is though what next?

My p.o.a is to not nagg her and try and talk to her again in 3/4 days maybe on sunday when shes bored. Try and continue talking and my long term goal is to continue talking with a view to her feeling comfortable and wanting to come see me. Ive been told that if i keep her attention, not to mention the breakup, abortion or getting back together and to keep it all light but most importantly be the funny lad she fell for when texting.

I know what most of you think, idiot for breaking n.c however, this wasnt a bad break up. There was never ever any arguements between us even when we split. Yeah the split wasnt nice but wasnt a slanging match. None of us did anything wrong.
I just really love her and id feel more of an idiot for not trying

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Your g/f of 3 months..probably not love.

Idiot for breaking NC?? No. Idiot for trying to get someone back, who you agree with your friends, does not want you? Yes.

You can keep going after her, but make sure you're putting in a real effort to pursue other women too.

[jcowap]

Im kinda involved with another girl at the moment. Went on first date on tuesday and texting a lot amd we like each other. Wont get in a relationship anytime soon but a number of reason but im not focusing all my attemtion on my ex.

Maybe my friend was wrong?
Maybe We did finish because her head was a mess and she needed time away to get ot clewr? Only she knows.

I just feel like its worth another shot trying go pursue her, like i said none of us did anything wrong amd we didnt argue amd i also know she liked me a hell of a lot.

Wish me luck lol

[BackUpOrGetStng]

I do wish you luck. Just be careful and do not stop seeing the new girl, until you and your ex are exclusive again. Also, make sure you continue to give this new girl a real shot.

[TheCafeTerrace]

Maybe she broke up with you because she thought your presence in her life would be a constant reminder of the abortion?

Be very, very careful jcowap. If you love her then keep in mind the possibility that she might actually be better off without you. You're not just "the funny lad she fell for when texting" anymore, you're also the father of the aborted pregnancy.

[surfhb]

Dude....where a condom please

[jcowap]

Dude ... Im not sure what its like where you are from but around here, guys dont wear condoms when the girl is on a birth control tablet. Its unfound of. We just get regular testing. She forgot to take her tablet, thats how she fell pregnant.

TheCafeTerrace - ive been told that off somebody. I guess ill never understand what went on in her head at the time. My theory was this was a new relationship and she thought it all got too much too soon. She even admitted it didnt sound good being pregnant off a guy shes only just started seeing. Maybe my sensible friend was right.

All i cam do is see what happens. Im hoping her head is a lot clearer now and she does miss me and what we had. She even drunkenly rang me the last time we spoke and admitted she missed me, was showing her mates pics of me and admitted she removed me off fadebook because she didnt like seeing girls flirt with me on there. Maybe its just silly drunk talk i dont lknow.

I have had 1 date with this new girl and i do really like her and want go keep dating, obviously im going to take it slow and im not going to push for a relationship with her whilst my ex is in my head.

Think im just going to stick with what i said. Text my ex once maybe twice a week and if i keep her attemtion, look into asking her out casually. If i dont keep her attemtion and she stops responding ill know shes not making the effort but at least i tried

[TheCafeTerrace]

Ergh, when did texting become the main tool of sexual politics?

Dude ... Im not sure what its like where you are from but around here, guys dont wear condoms when the girl is on a birth control tablet. Its unfound of. We just get regular testing.

Not me mate, don't generalise. I always use condoms, even when I'm off my tits on drink and drugs.

Anyway, best of luck with it all.

[jcowap]

Hi everyone.

Further to my origional post.g

I text my ex again today and she replied a few times saying shes hungover etc etc so contact has been maintained.

I will try and carry this on and maybe text her now wednesday/thursday?

I just wanted to ask - she works at a hairdressers/sunbed shop. Is it ever a good idea to just turn up?
I was thinking i could nip on the sunbeds, say hi and maybe ask her if she wants to come out soon? Or is that a big no no?

My logic is if i turn up, she may realise she does miss me? I mean, she really was attracted to me when we was together - it may help. Im really not sure.

The other option is to see if i can keep her attention texting and if i do eventually ask her out.

Thanks