Does infatuation last for years?

[intpromeo]

I asked similar questions few months ago and 1 year back in some other sites.
I love a girl who is a dancer. When I asked it before, everyone said its infatuation. I'm 18 now, and I asked this question when i was 17. I still love her. The only problem is that I've not contacted her directly. I like her character, her background, her family, and her views. I feel that it really suits me and she suits me. She's cute for me personally, but frankly, she's not the most beautiful. I've seen hundreds and hundreds of girls who look prettier than her, but i never been attracted to anyone. Do you think this is still an infatuation? Could infatuation lead to real love?

[blue102]

Yeah it can last for years. Unless you actually have a relationship with someone, it can't be real love.

But infatuation can certainly lead to a real relationship

[intpromeo]

thnx for the reply.. . but i can never say its an infatuation now, i love her more than anything!!!!!
I haven't had relationships with anyone so far. May be, my character is not so romantic, i'm a kind of shy guy. But girls find me attractive. As I'm shy, I don't talk much to girls, i feel some insecurity. They think that i'm immature

[HeartIsAching]

Yes, it can last for years. Infatuation can last until you actually have a relationship with them - then it'll turn into something else.

You can't possibly love someone that you don't know. You can lust after them, you can be intrigued, you can be infatuated, but you can't love them unless you actually know them.

You are immature - but don't' worry, that will pass with time.

[searock]

Unless you actually have a relationship with someone, or in any case know someone really well and spend loads of time with them, it can't be real love.

I added the bolded part... you can actually fall in love with a close friend, for example.

In the OP's case, obviously it's just an infatuation, and yes, those things can last for years.

[Wakeup]

They can only last for years if you don't do the work to stop the infatuation. For instance: Op clings to his infatuation like it was his best friend instead of metally doing to work to get to indifference to someone who he hasn't even

contacted her directly

Dude... this isn't infatuation, it's more like obsession and its totally emotionally unhealthy.

You might want to google "Limerence" and read what apparently ails you. Time to figure out what you actually are suffering from so that you can do the mental exercise you need to do to overcome it. You're wasting your dating life clinging to her when you could be actively loving someone you've gotten to really know.

[basilandthyme]

I agree with Wakeup. This isn't infatuation - it's obsession and and it's very unhealthy.

One cannot love a person who they've never spent time with.

[intpromeo]

Ok,,,,, I got it, its not real love..