Don't know how to react

[michelle23]

That's a good idea. Ring his boss and get them both fired. Print the info on the website as proof. Change the locks and tell her-her stuff is going to charity if you don't get the ring back by tonight. Tell her you are not playing games and she has pushed you to your limit. If she doesn't want her stuff to be sent to a charity shop first thing tomorrow-that ring better be placed through the letterbox tonight in an envelope and if you don't get it back-follow through with your threat.

This is not your fault. Don't blame yourself. Shes obviously a narcissist-people like that are very good at living a lie-they feel no guilt so its easy for them to hide it...

The fact she expects you to actually forgive her proves how selfish she is. She doesn't get it at all. Your going to have to spell it out to her that you are not taking her back. You should also make something up to hurt her. Tell her your going on a date and moving on with your life. Let her know how it feels to think of you with someone else.

[HeartIsAching]

Tell her you are not playing games and she has pushed you to your limit. If she doesn't want her stuff to be sent to a charity shop first thing tomorrow-that ring better be placed through the letterbox tonight in an envelope and if you don't get it back-follow through with your threat.

That's a good way to get arrested for grand theft, merely for an exercise of power.

[ashley89]

That's a good idea. Ring his boss and get them both fired. Print the info on the website as proof.

I know he's angry and upset but I think this is taking it a little too far

[michelle23]

I know he's angry and upset but I think this is taking it a little too far

I dont think so to be honest. I think the boss is a wanker and deserves everything he gets-his wife deserves better and dabstars gf had her chance to change four years ago when he forgave her the first time. She deserves it!

If someone treated me like that-I wouldnt be responsible for my actions. Sorry but it is so wrong on so many levels. If my man ever cheated on me-he would regret it for the end of his days.

[michelle23]

That's a good way to get arrested for grand theft, merely for an exercise of power.

lol I'm assuming that she wouldn't get the police involved but I see your point. He should still make the threat anyway at least-he needs the ring back!!

[Dabstar]

I honestly have no idea what I'm gonna do. I am angry & hurt but I can't just turn off 5 & a half years of feelings... that's what is making this hurt the most. Equally though I'm done with letting her walk all over me, I've been Mr Nice Guy for far too long and look how that's ended up. If I can't get in touch with the asshole's wife (which at the moment I can't), I'm going to report him to his boss. If that means they both end up getting fired then, honestly, it's the least they deserve. I'm going to let Cheryl know though before I do anything, if she wants to tell me where they live to keep her job then she can.

I'm not sure about what to do with her things... all I want is the ring back & there's no issue. It really shouldn't be too much to ask. Don't get me wrong, I've got about a thousand things I'd like to do with them but I'm not gonna lower myself to her level.

[michelle23]

Get your ring back anyway. Don't leave her to pawn it off-shell probably sell it for 50 quid. Dont give her any of her stuff until you get it. Stand your ground.

[Dabstar]

She's refusing to do this gracefully & doesn't seem to realise how much what she's done has killed me; if she did she'd understand that we are not getting back together. She's still refusing to give me back the ring & has even had her dad on the phone to me trying to persuade me to "not overreact" and give her another chance. It's unbelievable. I'm not doing anything to be cruel to her, she's destroyed my life and yet is trying to make me feel like the guilty one - how can she do that? All I want is a clean break now, I know that's what I need. Even a holiday just to get out of this situation for a bit.

She's coming round tomorrow to tell me where the guy lives. If she's wanting her things, I'm wanting the ring - I'm not budging on that.

I keep thinking that this is just the worst nightmare and I'll wake up, I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. It's all such a mess.

[tassy]

You already forgave her once for cheating which makes you a bit of a fool. What do do? Dump her.

Excuse me but I dont think anyone is a fool or even a bit of one to give someone they love another chance. I personaly think that line about "fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me" is unfair, i read somewhere this line "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice even more shame on you! Being fooled does not make you a fool" It is the other person who is being deceitful that deserves shame as they are being disrespectful to the one who is unaware and trusting the other with their heart.
Maybe she needs help, but in any case dabstar you have to do what is right for you. I feel for you, the confusion and heartache must be almost unbearable hugs to you, but please dont add self doubt to the list of things going through your head as this was not you it was all her own doing, her choices. Take care of you for now maybe seek some professional help yourself and maybe even suggest the same to her for herself. Whatever the case you should take time out for you to think. xx

[Wakeup]

Fool Dabster once, shame on her.. Fool Dabster twice.. and get a ring.

I suggested you get the ring off her finger first (by feining insurance reasons) before going postal on her ass. If you had of done that you could have just put her stuff on the front porch, locked the door and let her pick it up without all the bs.

Quit talking to her. Quit trying to reek revenge on her ass and those she cheated with... If you don't, you simply like the drama so you should just let her back into your life until she fools you for a bracelet to match the ring.

The longer you drag this drama out, the longer it will take you to heal from her evil doing.

[Dabstar]

Excuse me but I dont think anyone is a fool or even a bit of one to give someone they love another chance. I personaly think that line about "fool me once shame on you fool me twice shame on me" is unfair, i read somewhere this line "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice even more shame on you! Being fooled does not make you a fool" It is the other person who is being deceitful that deserves shame as they are being disrespectful to the one who is unaware and trusting the other with their heart.
Maybe she needs help, but in any case dabstar you have to do what is right for you. I feel for you, the confusion and heartache must be almost unbearable hugs to you, but please dont add self doubt to the list of things going through your head as this was not you it was all her own doing, her choices. Take care of you for now maybe seek some professional help yourself and maybe even suggest the same to her for herself. Whatever the case you should take time out for you to think. xx

Thanks, I appreciate it.

Fool Dabster once, shame on her.. Fool Dabster twice.. and get a ring.

I suggested you get the ring off her finger first (by feining insurance reasons) before going postal on her ass. If you had of done that you could have just put her stuff on the front porch, locked the door and let her pick it up without all the bs.

Quit talking to her. Quit trying to reek revenge on her ass and those she cheated with... If you don't, you simply like the drama so you should just let her back into your life until she fools you for a bracelet to match the ring.

The longer you drag this drama out, the longer it will take you to heal from her evil doing.

It wasn't possible to get the ring first, she knew something was up. Forgive me for not being great at hiding my emotions in the circumstances. You're right though, this isn't me - I'm being dragged into playing her games again, doing things on her terms - to hell with all this.

[Wakeup]

speaking of drama: Invite the cow over to pick up her stuff but before she comes, have a real classy looking escort there to keep you company (tell the cow it's your new gf) and if she starts her schpeel about wanting a second chance again, have your "date" ask her to leave you alone, you're her's now.

[bearz]

speaking of drama: Invite the cow over to pick up her stuff but before she comes, have a real classy looking escort there to keep you company (tell the cow it's your new gf) and if she starts her schpeel about wanting a second chance again, have your "date" ask her to leave you alone, you're her's now.

lol! Charlie Sheen style: WINNING!

[michelle23]

Itl take time to get through this. Dont block out your emotions-you need to feel the pain, angry etc first before you can heal.

Take your time and see a counsellor-you need help with this as she has just turned your whole world upside down. You will come out of it though feeling stronger than ever and proud of yourself.

Dont bother seeking revenge-shes someone elses problem now and that scummy boss of hers will be found out at some stage too.

[ashley89]

Dont bother seeking revenge-shes someone elses problem now and that scummy boss of hers will be found out at some stage too.

before you were telling him to go into her job to tell the boss and print it on the website, now you say don't seek revenge lololol