Moving on

[branford]

Hello Guys!

Thanks for taking the time to read this thread. I had a rough weeks dealing with with my ex girlfriend. After we broke up, I decided not to contact her by any means like texting, calling or even sending private messages in facebook for 2 weeks just to figure what went wrong in our relationship and start focusing on myself instead. But after that, I decided to message her via facebook though i thought that the moment we broke up I should have done what's best by deleting her to my fb friends but I didn't. So I sent her message about how sorry I am for hurting her feeling by making her feel neglected and tell her that for 2 weeks of not contacting her that I still love her and asking her to give me chance blah..blah...blah. Each week, I keep sending her a message in fb telling how sorry I am by realizing everything I've done wasn't good enough that I should prioritize her more and asking her to give me a chance but still doesn't get any replies (this thing happens for 3 weeks). What hurts the most is that she keep posting many quotes about how guys should treat well their gf, about moving on by not having any regrets from the past but take it a lesson learned stuff like that and keep posting some party pictures she attended that makes me think that she's happy and me being lonely... I am really hurt when she does that specially the way she ignores me. We broke up because of the lack of time I spent with her but even if we don't see each other we still keep in touch like texting or calling by phone but it wasn't good enough for her. Last week, I decided to message her again for the last time. I told her the same thing and tell her this that I'd been there outside her office building waiting for her for a couple of days but haven't any courage to face her. I told her that it will be the last message I will sent to her that even if I don't get any response I will move on and completely stay away from her in which I already did. Days later, I decided to check my mail to see if she reply to my message. I was shocked the moment I read her reply she said that everything she post on her fb account wasn't really directed to me. I get more confused because she keeps posting some hatred messages/ quotes and tries to tagged me with that message and her friends keep on liking it which hurts the most. Why she said that? Is that the way how she deals with our break up? If every messages she post wasn't really directed to me though I feel the pain and I'm easily affected to what she said and does in her fb account. One more thing she also said to me in that message that she's starting to get scared at me and ask me to stop texting or sending private messages. I don't know why she got scared at me. Does waiting for her outside her office building the reason why she started to get scared at me or because of the messages I sent to her?. Did I push her away to much? She said to me before that she's not the type of girl that goes back to her ex. I didn't listen to that instead I still pursue of winning her back but in the end I failed. After reading that message I decided to delete her in my fb friends list. I didn't do that out of anger or bitterness but for my own sake by giving respect to myself, find someone who is better and also for me to move though I'm still coping with the pain. I also block her on my fb and even delete her photos or everything that reminds me of her. Right now, I'm not interested to know what she's up to or what she's doing cause I know it will only hurt me and will only makes hard for me to move on. I'm not sure if what I did was right but sometimes I am thinking to type and search her name on fb but my mind says NO and DON'T DO IT cause it will only hurt myself more. I'm planning to go to dating but I'm not ready to commit myself in any girls right now and have no plans to go in a reboud relationship cause I don't want to hurt someone else feelings. What should i do more to forget my ex and move on? Am I on the right track? Any advice would be highly appreciated. Thanks

[smackie9]

Yes you are on the right track. You would have been in a better place now if you have just deleted everything and went NC in the first place....leasson learned?

[michelle23]

its natural to go into denial or a bargaining stage where you cant accept its over and try get them back. most people who are dumped go through this and then feel humiliated or a complete idiot after but dont be too hard on yourself. you were not ready to let go but you are now so well done.

i think shes an attention seeker and drama queen posting all that crap on FB. shes not worth the agro with all her drama and bulls**t.

stop blaming yourself for the break up. it sounds like you are not compatable and have different expectations and theres nothing you can do about that.

it will just take time to get over her. try to stay busy. concentrate on work or school, spend time with family and friends, join a new hobby and in time youll start to feel better and youll get over her

good luck

[branford]

thanks smackie9 and michelle23!

[smackie9]

thanks smackie9 and michelle23!

Your welcome! and best of luck to you! with your attitude I see much happiness in your future

[branford]

Hello Guys!

One more thing she also said to me in that message that she's starting to get scared at me and ask me to stop texting or sending private messages. I don't know why she got scared at me. Does waiting for her outside her office building the reason why she started to get scared at me or because of the messages I sent to her?. Did I push her away to much?

Just one last question. This suddenly crossed my mind on why she got scared of me. Don't have any idea why she said that. Is it just part of her excuse?

[michelle23]

I think she has made herself clear that she doesnt want to be with you and by refusing to give up-it comes across as stalkerish which is why she said that

[branford]

Again, Thanks Michelle for explaining.

[smackie9]

Everyone's desperation is varied, and for some can get out of control.....you were just being guided by your emotions but I agree that it came off as stalkerish even tho you meant no harm. Hey you were hurt and couldn't help yourself. Oh well lesson learned eh?

[branford]

Yeah! Lesson learned but anyway everything is clear now though I'm still in the process of moving on I can tell that I am 100% sure that I don't feel any neediness, lonely nor hate about what happened to us unlike the other weeks. Thanks again!