Hi all, This post may go on, but thanx if you read and reply to it.
Im 20yrs old and ive been with my girlfriend for 11 months. Scince the first day we went out we havn't spent a single day without each other, the first day we met we slept in the same bed ( didnt have sex until 4 months after ) then from that day onward we lived together. We now live in a private house and are sort of settling down now, i want to marry her and i know she does to BUT there are some issues. I think im a bit of a control freak, i treat her like im her dad, and when she does something wrong i critasize her and sometimes get angry ( Not tot he extent of hitting her, id never do that ). Im so good to her , if i have £30 left in my bank ill go out and buy her something, just to make her feel that little bit extra special. I always try to make her feel special and love her but sometimes i think its only me thats putting the work in.
On days i come home from work and im tiered, but i will still try to help her and i still show her love, but when she comes home from work she goes straight upstairs, puts her dressinggown on, makes something to eat and goes to sleep, and shows me little love. When i confront her she starts crying and says shes sorry and she will try, but she dont.
Im 20 and Shes 17 ( 18 in August ), is that age difference a cause of this? She was naughty at school, never listened to her parents and always thought she could fall back on her family whenever something goes wrong. He previous boyfriends have been drug abusers, so i can see why she gets a bit scared, maybee they hit her or something, Her Mom and Family really like me and they say ive changed her for the best and got her to act more like an adult, which i tryed my best to get her to stop acting childish.
All i want is a clean slate and start working on things and building a solid foundation under us both. I love her to bits but ive also had thoughts of walking out. She isnt the enemy in this, id say i was, and id say i was a control freak, but like anyone, all i want is to be shown love back. She may be only 17 but she chose to grow up fast, she chose to get a job and buy a place with me, so really she needs to act a bit more grown up i think. Everytime i try to teach her she snaps at me and thinks im having a go at her, which maybee due to her mom. Her mom used to tell her stuff, like how to mop up, or how to polish and she used to tell her mom she will do it her way and cause an argument with her mom.
How can i get her to learn and grow up at the same time as being relaxed and loving?
Feel free to comment and thanx for reading.
James