It's been nearly 2 weeks since I moved out and refused contact with my ex. He wrote me a letter and left it at my door last night, basically saying he was sorry, regretted how he acted, was immature etc...He also admitted that he had anger problems and that he had been trying to hide it from me at the beginning of our relationship, but that when it came out, he felt no control over it. He said he started therapy on Thursday last and he's going to continue it for at least the prescribed 12 weeks to help himself work on the reasons for his anger problem and to give him new coping skills when his temper begins to flare. He also listed a bunch of stuff he is doing each day to help himself (reading books, meditation, journaling) and what remedies/homeotherapy products he has already started. He joined a gym and goes each morning to help work off stress.
You know, I could very well regret it, but I'm going to see how things go. I'm not moving back in with him, but we're in touch now. We had lunch today and it was a little uncomfortable, we were both nervous. I was clear with him that I wouldn't put up with the crap he pulled on me before and that I had my doubts that he would change. He said he wanted to change for himself first and if I thought he was worth it, then he'd be really happy if I would move back in with him. I told him I didn't want to leave my apartment for a while now, but that I'd be okay with trying dating again, but if he missed one therapy appointment, I wouldn't talk to him ever again.
So at this point, we're dating again, we're taking it slow, but I'm going to have a zero tolerance policy. I know I'm strong enough because he said so many nice things after walking me back to my place, where 2 weeks ago I would have melted and forgiven him, I thanked him for lunch and said I'd be in touch tomorrow.
I want to give this another chance since he's making a lot of effort to change for himself. If it were a case of changing for me, I wouldn't have believed he could do it. I really hope it will work out this time, I'd like to believe in second chances. If I'm wrong though, I'm prepared for the consequences.