Honesty vs. Coming On Too Strong

[adonis_boy]

Here is the short story:

- Met this girl at a trip, clicked well, hanged out and talked all day long, had great chemistry.
- Took her out on a date, she initiated the first kiss and said it feels very comfortable with me, I replied it feels very right with her. She suggests cooking together at her place for the second date. For some reason, she tells me that she wants to take things slow and asks if it is ok with me. I say "of course, not a problem."
- She leaves town to visit her family for a week, before a possible second date. I decide to call her every other day but after she initiates texts and calls with me everyday, I decide to keep the contact every day. We text or call each other and she initiates half of them during the week. She still sounds very interested.
- In our phone conversation last night, the topic is about our fears and she opens up to me about very personal things, such as her insecurities and fear of being in front of public. I also share with her some of mine. I am this romantic guy so at the end of our talk, I tell her about this white butterfly I have seen today, that looks like her and she says that she thinks it would be too romantic, which kind of puts me off.
- After our phone call, I send her this text: "Thank you for opening up to me about your fears tonight. I feel pleasure in getting to know the real you, with all ups and downs. It means a lot to me.". I don't get a reply. Tonight, I call her and she does not call back.

In the end, this is who I am. I like being honest and upfront about my feelings and it makes me happy to let other person know about them but I realize that this might have scared her off somehow.

What do you think and how do you think I should proceed?

[searock]

Just because your personality doesn't seem to "click" with this girl's personality doesn't mean there's anything wrong with it or that you should change it.

Anyway, in this case I think you should stop saying romantic things to her for a while. After all, you've only gone on one date. Keep it light, playful and flirty, nothing touchy-feely. Don't let your emotions move too fast.

Don't contact her anymore (unless she contacts you first of course) until she's back in town. If you haven't heard from her by the time she's back in town, call her to decide when to go on the second date. If she doesn't reply, don't contact her anymore.

[4 ratties]

You didn't do anything wrong. She said let's take things slow and now she ran off scared so she may have issues or has been hurt in the past. Don't take it personal. Don't keep calling/texting her. Wait for her to reply and if she's worth it and does reply give it a shot but u may want to focus on a woman that isn't scared of a relationship at this time.

[smackie9]

I have a feeling she slam dunked you into the friends zone.

-Wants to take things slow

-Talked about real personal things

-Commented negatively to your romantic words

-no reply to your text

-didn't answer your call.

Don't text or call her anymore.

[adonis_boy]

Thank you for all the replies. Any other inputs?

I feel very sad because it is very difficult to meet a person that clicks so well with you and that understands you. She even said she enjoyed our conversation very much at the end of our last phone call. Now I keep asking what are the chances that something urgent happened or she is in a hospital, etc.

[searock]

I don't think you should contact her until she contacts you and/or she gets back in town. It would just seem needy to contact before one of those things happen, given that she hasn't replied to your last text or call.