I'm absolutely lost in love and desire for my fiancee....
I feel like Ive totally lost myself. Im a professional and successful guy recently divorced after 23 years with ex.
I have this new young GF and Im absolutely infatuated with her.
We have only been able to be together about 30 days (but basically 24 hours a day for those days) out of the last 3 months since we met. I think the time apart makes it more intense.
When we are together we normally have sex 2-5 times a day..usually she initiates it...she says she loves sex...something Ive never experienced with a woman before..my ex was not that fond of it and once a week quickie was par for the course.....
.Im 47 (a young 47) and she is 21 and hot as hell......so far in this short relationship.....some days we do little else but lie around in hotels and make love.
I had not been with her for 3 weeks and arrived to see her Sunday. She would not even let me take a shower after 24 hours flying before pulling me down for love making.
Sadly the next day she got food po isoning and slowly got sicker over the past 3 days....took her to the doctor today and she got IV fluids and antibiotics...she has been sleeping all the time since last night....
Its 6 pm and this will be the first day out of 30+ days we have spent together that we have not made love.
I'm being 100% supportive and loving to her but inside Im absolutely going CRAZY.....I realize she is still tired and sick..but the idea of not making love to her today is driving me nuts.
Argh...Im so selfish....what is wrong with me...
Im in love too much.....I cant even stand to be in the room with her while she sleeps....
I really feel like Ive gone over the top.....Im too much in love and lust and Im afraid it cant end well.
She is foreign and Im trying to get a fiancee Visa for her so she can come to US for 3 months and we can see if we want to get married. Its in process already but its going to take 6 months.
Ive actually considered selling my business just so I can move over here and be with her all the time.
On the other hand we have never lived a day of "real life" together....and we have little in common other than physical affection and going out to eat!
What is wring with me...I think my genes are just controlling me and wanting me to make a baby.
Of, on top of it, I got HSV2 from her. She didnt know she had it...I do believe her on that.
Ive been having sex with her with no condom almost since the beginning . She does not like them.
She is not pregers as of today got the test...thinking that might be the cause of the nausea.
Im even thinking Id be happy if she was pregnant.
On the other hand there are so many things wrong with her and the potential relationship I cant even begin to list them!
What is wrong with me....why am I infatuated? I love sex with her so much...she is amazingly fun. She is so sweet compared to my ex....(who was an ice queen).....
ARGH! I love this and hate it at the same time...each time I come to visit her Im terrified that for some reason she wont show at the airport!