lovesick advice

[laytonsox]

Hi this is my first post here, and I have a slightly problem and wouldn't mind some advice. There is someone I fell for very badly a while back. My story begins in May when I started this seasonal job for the Park Service. I met this woman during training, she worked at a nearby park and me and another guy began hanging out a lot. Well, we had a toga party, and it was during the party I realized I was falling for her. Unfortunately, I fooled around for a month, and then I realized she had pretty much figured it out. So, I decided to meet her for coffee and tell her. I will say I was very conflicted, while I really liked her, I was not sure if I wanted to dive into a relationship. I told her how I felt, but she then told me,said that she didn't want to get involved with anyone right now. She had just broken up with her boyfriend a few months earlier and it was a bad breakup. He basically told her that it was him or her new job. I then told her that I didn't want to lose her as a friend, and then we had a long very good talk, learning a lot about her.

However, I think I fell for her worse later and I before I left I think I might have fallen in love with her. I never told her any of that and I think I repressed my feelings pretty well. Now, there were a few times that I put my foot in my mouth around her, not really sure if she picked up on anything. She still seemed very comfortable with me though. For instance for her birthday, I gave her a gift, and she was very happy even hugging me. She never seemed to avoid me, and made eye contact when we talked. I kept my feelings quite, though. When the job ended in November, she had to stay for another month. She hugged me again when I last saw her and said lets keep in touch. Now I don't read anything into the hugs except I believe it shows she sees us as friends. Over the last two months, we talk occasionally on Facebook maybe like once a week or so and our conservations seem very friendly.

I guess my problem is I still have feelings for her, but I am not really looking at pursuing anything other than maybe being close friends. I do think it is very likely we will be working together or near each other next summer. My big question is should I tell her any of this? Or should I just continue to keep it quite. I am afraid it will make things awkward between us. I had thought that by next summer I will probably be less over her and might tell her about some of these feelings but saying how it had all past. Now I am not 100% sure that I should even tell her that. Does anybody have any advice for me about this?

[3mK]

Keep it to yourself. Find someone else to 'distract' you from thinking about her so much.