Should I get in a relationship with a girl who I could just have sex with

[Inexperienced]

Okay, so I'm 19 and not had a girlfriend since I was 14, since then all I have wanted is a girlfriend, I used to be really shy so it was not until recently that I've been able to speak to girls, I've spoken to and got close to 3 girls (2 of them I've met) but every time they just lost interest or just used me, Thankfully I don't sit and weep about being rejected I move onto the next girl and I've already met a new girl despite being mugged off by a girl as little as a week ago but this girl is different I've been told I could have sex with her obviously she is after a relationship too but wouldn't mind sex, and now i'm debating do I want a relationship? Judging by how I've been used recently I'm unsure if I even want a girlfriend now and think friends with benefits is how I want to go about now. I'm unsure and that's why I'm asking the question, is a relationship pointless when I could just have sex, but obviously I won't have the experience of being loved...

[Boisdevie]

It might just get the 'I'm a virgin' bit out of your system. It was like that for me.

[Inexperienced]

It might just get the 'I'm a virgin' bit out of your system. It was like that for me.

I agree, 100%. I'm probably wrong but I feel as soon as I have sex I won't care anymore because I knew I would of done it... I'll see how it goes because she is a nice girl and I know would treat me right, maybe I should drop my standards and give it a go.

[michelle23]

If you move on so easily and are not the type to dwell on rejection or being hurt then why have you dropped your standards from a loving relationship to just sex?

[Inexperienced]

If you move on so easily and are not the type to dwell on rejection or being hurt then why have you dropped your standards from a loving relationship to just sex?

Good question, I have no idea, I'll have to think about that, haha. I'm not hurt I honestly feel fine and do move on quickly, maybe I'm hurt but blocking it out and telling myself I'm not, but I just don't want a relationship anymore maybe feelings will change when I get to know her more but I think right now all I want is sex....

[UKRomantic]

You're 19, at that age people use other just for sex all the time.

not saying it's right, but it's just what happens. if you think you will feel bad about it afterwards, tell her that you're not looking for anything serious.

[searock]

Whatever you decide, just make sure you tell her before you have sex whether you want a relationship or you want just sex. That way she will know what to expect and you won't feel bad about having "tricked" her.

[michelle23]

LOL like that will work. Most people are idiots when they get all infatuated as we have seen a thousand times before. They start thinking "well maybe when they get to know me better" blah blah blah. Most people seem to be half deaf when they are told straight up I just want to f**k you, nothing more, nothing less. They still hope and pray that something will change as again we have seen here a thousand time..

[searock]

Yeah, but at least *he* will have done the right thing, therefore he will have nothing to feel bad about. If she chooses to ignore his words and to believe that "maybe someday he'll fall for me", that's going to be entirely on her if she gets heartbroken when she realizes that he will *not* fall for her. Also, it might (might!) teach her a lesson for the next time.

[basilandthyme]

Completely agree with Searock. Where you take this is your choice, but do the right thing and make sure she knows that all you want is a casual arrangement. Also, make sure she knows that she doesn't have to be exclusive with you - being exclusive is the best way to ensure that someone thinks they've got a chance at a relationship with you.

[Rowen]

Don't just settle for sex. Think about what you truly want and go for it.

[Inexperienced]

Don't just settle for sex. Think about what you truly want and go for it.

I'm not sure what I want anymore I did want a relationships but after the incidents with these last two girls it's put me off

[4 ratties]

Don't get into a relationship until your ready. Having sex with random girls at 19 is awesome just use a condom

[Rowen]

I'm not sure what I want anymore I did want a relationships but after the incidents with these last two girls it's put me off

Then I change my answer... Get as much milk for free as you can because you're not ready.