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Thread: I need advice on how to be part of someone's life

  1. #1
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    I need advice on how to be part of someone's life

    I'm in my early 20s, and I met someone the other night who made me feel excited about life again. We talked only briefly, so I only know a little about this person.

    Now I want to contact this person again but I'm not sure how to do it. I am also quite anxious. I should probably preface things by saying that I am a pretty introverted, shy, nerdy guy, and I find it hard to hold conversations, especially when it's with someone where I'm constantly afraid of misspeaking for fear of 'screwing up'. I also consider myself not as "grown-up" as people my age... but that's hard to quantify.

    But apart from my lack of social prowess, there's the issue that so far the intersection of our two lives is that one night where we met. I've been in a relationship before, but that was with someone in the same school, so the day-to-day interaction made it relatively easy to stay close. I've noticed that lack of day-to-day interaction with past friends has made it very hard to maintain a friendship. That is not to say that I couldn't meet up with this person every day, but I'm afraid it will become a chore of some sort, as we run through things to do and places to go. Not to mention, I fear that since our lives don't intersect much we will run out of things to talk about and we will dry up.

    First of course, I need to talk to this person again... I have them on facebook but I get horrible anxiety every time I think of starting a conversation. For me love is a bittersweet pill, I feel so happy around this person but also deathly afraid of them.

    I know this stuff probably sounds elementary to a lot of you love gurus, but I guess I am just very inexperienced.

    I'd appreciate any advice at all

    Here's a Tl;dr i guess:
    - My social awkwardness gives me anxiety
    - I don't know how to start talking to this person
    - I don't know how I would maintain a relationship
    Last edited by Mysterion; 09-03-14 at 12:10 AM.

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mysterion View Post
    - My social awkwardness gives me anxiety
    - I don't know how to start talking to this person
    - I don't know how I would maintain a relationship
    1: are you awkward with all people or just girls you have a crush on? Suggest you keep interacting with all and sundry just to get over the fear
    2: smile and say 'Hi' at the next event you see her at
    3: if you have a lot in common, the relationship will maintain itself. If you've got **** all in common, the relationship will die and you'll both find new love. It really is this simple.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

  3. #3
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    I don't know when I'll see her again, should I just take the plunge and ask her out online?

  4. #4
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    You've got nothing to lose.
    Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, forgotten or undone. So, take it as a lesson learned and move on.

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