Partner is neglecting me.

[randomperson83]

Hello, first of all I would like to thank you for taking the time and reading my post.
Ok, here it goes. I am a man 30 years old living with my girlfriend 24 years old, we have been together for around 4 and half yearsand have been living together for around 2 and a half.
It has been a month now, she has made a new friend in an online game that we play together, which the game is kinda the only thing we actually do together, but not much anymore since then.
In the past we used to play alot and spend time together, but nowdays the first thing she does in the morning and last before she sleeps is go online to talk to her friend.
She spends alot more time with him than with me and rarely opens a conversation with me, I have to do it.
Quite a few times I asked her to do something but whenever she is with her friend she just neglects me and doesn't want to spent any time with me.
This really is bothering me and I have showed it to her, when I approached the subject she just said she doesn't have any other friends.
I don't know how to approach this subject with her, already did a couple of times, told her how neglected I feel and that she spents so much time with him and none with me, but all I got from her is
"I don't think I am doing anything wrong, I don't have any other friends, I don't see the problem".
I feel she can't see my point of view or maybe I don't see hers, I really don't know what to do and I hope you can help me out. If any more information is needed please just ask in a reply.
Thanks again for your time.

[basilandthyme]

I think that the crush she has on the game guy is not the problem. Rather, it's a symptom of a problem. The problem being that she's totally bored with both you and the lack of friends in her life.

You say that this game was the only thing you actually did together. What a sad indictment on your relationship! Do you never go out to dinner, or to a bar, a movie or a picnic? You don't shop together? Cook together? Laugh at stupid jokes together? You don't share interests or thoughts on domestic/world issues? Frankly, if this was the state of your relationship, it sounds like it was pretty much dead anyway. How did the relationship end up in this state?

As for her having no friends, what's that all about? Why does she have no friends?

If you want to fix this, she needs to be on board and work together with you to invigorate the relationship. But the question is "does she want to fix it?" It may be too far gone for her.

[smackie9]

This isn't about gamimg or the guy I agree, it's your relationship. Sometimes a relationship just runs it's course and you or them fall out of love. Doing things together, etc may not fix this, because peoples feeling with change even when a realtionship is good. It just take them to meet soomeone new to realize their heart isn't into it anymore. You are just going to have an open honest talk with her and re-evaluate your relationship. Maybe it is time to move on.

[TheEvilJester]

I do agree with the others. It does sound like she lost interest in you. I will also add, however, that I personally think her behavior is immature and utter bullcrap. If she has lost interest in you, she needs to be an adult and come clean with you. Either break it off and let you find somebody who will appreciate you, or put in some actual work to try to make it work. My personal recommendation would be to break it off with her. I too would wonder why an online game was all you two had together anyway. That isn't much of a relationship. You were together 4 and a half years, and she can just suddenly decide to ditch you for some loser online? Unless there are some MAJOR parts of the story you are not sharing, it sounds like she doesn't deserve you anyway. Again, my advice would be to leave her and find somebody who will actually appreciate you. But, of course, that will have to be your decision. Good luck.

[pcmaster]

Ignore her. Let her do what she wants and let it be her who looks for contact. When she does turn to you do something fun, extraordinar together. Like take her out to restaurant or to some fun place like nighclub or waterpark. Im meanwhile while shes busy show her that you have a life and meet with your friends, be busy and basicaly eventualy she will get bored with her online thing and will want to be part of your life. If you support her then stop cause cleary she dont apreciate it or what you do for her. She showing signs of heavy computer addiction. google it and read about this online addiction so you know how to deal with her.