Can't receive oral sex

[searock]

Haha yeah, I like the idea of using him as a sex toy... not in a bad way of course - I'd like being used like that XD, and I'm pretty sure he would, too. I just hope I'll manage to do it without feeling guilty or insecure or anything of the sort. Thank you for your advice, I'm less worried and more hopeful now .

[HeartIsAching]

Wow, you poor thing.

It would drive me absolutely bat-shit crazy if I were in a relationship with you. I love to give oral sex to women. Absolutely love it.

You should definitely talk to him about it. If/when you're in a place to explore some sort of therapy, I'd recommend it. Poor searock.

[searock]

I can imagine, I mean I love giving oral sex to men so I know how bad it must be to not be able to! I feel so guilty and wrong!

[HeartIsAching]

I can imagine, I mean I love giving oral sex to men so I know how bad it must be to not be able to! I feel so guilty and wrong!

Oh no!

You're not guilty of anything. It's gotta suck. See someone though, sometime? And like Vashti said, you might very well change as you get more comfortable in a relationship.

[searock]

Yeah I really hope so! It's just... I know that if I hadn't had those horrible experiences when I was younger, it wouldn't be so much of a problem now! I have already gotten over a lot, I used to be waay more uncomfortable than I currently am regarding sex in general, so I really hope it's going to get better even in this particular issue. I probably need more time than I'd like to admit, to get over that stuff. I'm just awfully sorry that my partner is the one who has to pay for my problems. Ugh.

[HeartIsAching]

What horrible experiences... if it's not too personal?

I'm finding it hard to imagine. I mean, from a man's point of view most women are ok at giving oral, a few are really bad at it, and a few are really good at it, but even the bad ones are better (usually) than none at all.

[Evo1114]

I dated a girl who was BAD...like REALLY bad and I was too afraid to tell her. (WAAAYYY too much teeth, it HURT). So I'd always lie and say I was too ticklish for blow jobs. It was depressing. Actually she was pretty bad at handjobs too believe it or not...that was painful too. But the cock-in-vagina stuff was incredible, so I still was able to get my jollies.

[searock]

What horrible experiences... if it's not too personal?

I'm finding it hard to imagine. I mean, from a man's point of view most women are ok at giving oral, a few are really bad at it, and a few are really good at it, but even the bad ones are better (usually) than none at all.

When I was 17 I dated a guy who was 20 years older than me. I was a virgin and had only been kissed once, before him. I was clueless. He pushed and pushed until he did all kinds of stuff to me - without letting me reciprocate - and most of the times I would cry after it. I was young and naive and pretty stupid, but I didn't realize how bad he was hurting me until years later. At the time, I thought it was normal and I thought I wanted it. I would literally leave his house in tears, and cry myself to sleep just by thinking about it, so yeah, it was pretty traumatic, and I quite clearly did not "want" it. My fault. I can't believe I was so dumb. I'm paying for it now, I just wish it didn't have to reflect on anybody else .

[xdxsyyb]

Don't ever do anything you're uncomfortable with.

[HeartIsAching]

Don't ever do anything you're uncomfortable with.

Brilliant insight.