what constitutes a rebound relationship

[Zanderini]

Fine you're still not over her. But as part of your healing process I'm trying to tell you you don't need to know. I'm trying to say listen son, it doesn't matter anymore. It's unfortunate that it went down like this but that doesn't mean anything is going to change. She's dating someone different. Oh well. Time to get on with life. You need to move on now.

actually i am over her. I know i am better off without her and i dont spend all day wondering what the hell she is doing. there is a small part of me still interested. i do things to better myself and have a good time without her

[girl68]

Good, so then you know you don't have to know!

[oliviareeves]

I think you still love her and this is the reason you are concerned about it, or she is not out of your mind, or she didn't got involved in a relationship with you but with someone else.... in all the three cases there is only one thing I can say that is get over her... move on.... and find a gud gal for her and show her you are not dying without her or anything like that.... show her you know how to move on in life....

[Zanderini]

Good, so then you know you don't have to know!

there lies the the problem i know i dont have to but im always curious and shouldnt be.its just like theres a part of it i cant let go. She did the obvious things to get rid of me. delete from fb and skype refuse to be friends with me etc...

[Zanderini]

I think you still love her and this is the reason you are concerned about it, or she is not out of your mind, or she didn't got involved in a relationship with you but with someone else.... in all the three cases there is only one thing I can say that is get over her... move on.... and find a gud gal for her and show her you are not dying without her or anything like that.... show her you know how to move on in life....

clearly ive demonstrated that by respecting her wishes not to contact her because i havent been except out of neccesity. I dont care that she is in a relationship im actually happy for her even though i dont think he's the right guy to be honest. ive been doing everything i can but she is not out of my mind

[soulsurvivor23]

clearly ive demonstrated that by respecting her wishes not to contact her because i havent been except out of neccesity. I dont care that she is in a relationship im actually happy for her even though i dont think he's the right guy to be honest. ive been doing everything i can but she is not out of my mind

Whether you want to admit to it or not, you're not over her and you're not happy for her, and that's ok. You don't have to be happy for her, it's not a requirement. But what you do definitely need to do is to stop focusing on her and her relationship. For whatever reason, she chose him good or bad right or wrong. So, you just gotta stick the course and keep doing the things you been doing. I'm struggling right now as well, but I try to look at it like this:

It's basically like if I start doing an intense diet and exercise plan (as i've actually done for the past 2-3 weeks) and i'm not seeing any kind of fast results. Even though I would like to look in the mirror and see a cut, muscular guy staring back at me, I know that it's only been a few weeks so I can't really expect that. However, I also know that regardless of me not seeing quick results, what i'm doing is the right thing for my body and in time I will see great results. In that same sense, exercising, surfing, and all the other things you do to distract yourself and occupy your time are helping you, slowly. You will have a grieving period, and you will have times when you miss her and that's all normal. But stay the course and keep doing things for yourself without worrying about her and I believe (and hope) it'll all be better in the end.

[Zanderini]

Whether you want to admit to it or not, you're not over her and you're not happy for her, and that's ok. You don't have to be happy for her, it's not a requirement. But what you do definitely need to do is to stop focusing on her and her relationship. For whatever reason, she chose him good or bad right or wrong. So, you just gotta stick the course and keep doing the things you been doing. I'm struggling right now as well, but I try to look at it like this:

It's basically like if I start doing an intense diet and exercise plan (as i've actually done for the past 2-3 weeks) and i'm not seeing any kind of fast results. Even though I would like to look in the mirror and see a cut, muscular guy staring back at me, I know that it's only been a few weeks so I can't really expect that. However, I also know that regardless of me not seeing quick results, what i'm doing is the right thing for my body and in time I will see great results. In that same sense, exercising, surfing, and all the other things you do to distract yourself and occupy your time are helping you, slowly. You will have a grieving period, and you will have times when you miss her and that's all normal. But stay the course and keep doing things for yourself without worrying about her and I believe (and hope) it'll all be better in the end.

I am happy for her honestly. if she is happier in a relationship with someone other than me than so be it. its been monthes now and cant stop thinking of her although the thoughts are mainly negative but still thoughts about her. im doing my best to shed them but cant.

[cmacattack1]

Me too. I'm going through the same thing you are. I've been having a rough time with dating as I've felt I sort of need somebody. Not only because I'm used to having somebody there, but it also would be the fact that I would show her change and that I could move on past that. It's not like people reconnect after not being with other people right? You come back because what you had wasn't doing the trick. And those reasons are the wrong way to go about it. Hence me being in a single, lonely position.

I'm happy for my ex although I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't want to be with her. You have to keep telling yourself that you had an opportunity and it didn't work. I think it's been long enough for you to analyze what went wrong and why. And regardless of whether it was your fault or the fact that she just lost interest and you made things worse with your post breakup behavior, the result is the same. You lost her and you will more than likely never have her back like you want. You don't want to let go, it's very difficult but for your own good you have to. You cannot be happy with somebody else if you are still consumed by this. You can't control how you think about her but you can certain give it your best effort to stay distracted. You will always find a time by yourself when you are alone and thinking about her and it makes it difficult.

It is over. There isn't anything you can do about it. She isn't coming back. What has happened has happened.

[Zanderini]

Me too. I'm going through the same thing you are. I've been having a rough time with dating as I've felt I sort of need somebody. Not only because I'm used to having somebody there, but it also would be the fact that I would show her change and that I could move on past that. It's not like people reconnect after not being with other people right? You come back because what you had wasn't doing the trick. And those reasons are the wrong way to go about it. Hence me being in a single, lonely position.

I'm happy for my ex although I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't want to be with her. You have to keep telling yourself that you had an opportunity and it didn't work. I think it's been long enough for you to analyze what went wrong and why. And regardless of whether it was your fault or the fact that she just lost interest and you made things worse with your post breakup behavior, the result is the same. You lost her and you will more than likely never have her back like you want. You don't want to let go, it's very difficult but for your own good you have to. You cannot be happy with somebody else if you are still consumed by this. You can't control how you think about her but you can certain give it your best effort to stay distracted. You will always find a time by yourself when you are alone and thinking about her and it makes it difficult.

It is over. There isn't anything you can do about it. She isn't coming back. What has happened has happened.

What has happened has happened and i know im not getting her back. im not holding out with hopes to have her back either. I am simply just curious about whats going on with her. nothing more nothing less

[cmacattack1]

Maybe she's not ready for you to pop back into her life. In a way, completely blocking you out of her life keeps you pursuing her because you are curious. Girls like this, girls expect this, it's typical behavior. More importantly, she might not be ready for that and you might have unintentionally brought more pain into her life. You don't want to do that do you?

You want to know if her relationship will last and how long. Seems like an ulterior motive to me, that's all. It's too soon. I know you are hurting buddy, you just have to soldier through. It's too soon, don't rush it.

[Zanderini]

Maybe she's not ready for you to pop back into her life. In a way, completely blocking you out of her life keeps you pursuing her because you are curious. Girls like this, girls expect this, it's typical behavior. More importantly, she might not be ready for that and you might have unintentionally brought more pain into her life. You don't want to do that do you?

You want to know if her relationship will last and how long. Seems like an ulterior motive to me, that's all. It's too soon. I know you are hurting buddy, you just have to soldier through. It's too soon, don't rush it.

i am hurting i rally dont want t be in a relationship with her again though too many hassles. all i want to be a friend and have a friend after evrything ive done to help her turn her life around. and no i really dont want to cause her more pain hence i have been respecting her wishes of not contacting her