How far do you go with taking 'revenge"?

[IncognitoSir]

Oh wowsers....who rattled your cage??

Don't judge and until you catch your Mrs in bed, fcking your best mate....

Then come back and discuss.

If that was the case I'd have to introduce them both to Glock #40 and Glock #38.......i kid i kid.....maybe

[xxazurexx]

Yeah, so revenge is a little far fetched. Its not the right thing to do.. And you do certainly feel like shit afterward.. It is only hurting yourself if you need to spend this much time and effort how to get your ex back.. Best thing for yourself is to move on and *forget*.

But saying that, in the heat of the moment when your all revved up and you have been seriously hurt.. I think its normal to think about hurting them the way they hurt you..
My ex was a complete bastard most of the time when i felt like i had tried my hardest with him.. I went up to his house to grab my phone charger...Didnt tell him i was going up there but he said he was there so didnt think it was a big deal. He wasnt there when i got there, so i tried calling him.. He was ignoring me and then turned his phone off. Hmm, i wonder what he was doing..lol
So i hated that he smoked weed and was constantly stoned. I saw all his bongs and bubblers.. And smiled I poured all the smelly bong water out of them onto his clothes, bed, couches. It smelled SO bad.
After i cooled off i felt so bad. And it definitely wasnt the right thing i should have done.. Even if someone really deserves being hurt, really the only one you hurt is yourself.
Spending time thinking about how to hurt another person.. HAS to be unhealthy. lol

Yeah, the guy in question in my situation was a bastard too. It wasn't just one or two crappy things. For one, I don't think cheating is just a 'crappy' thing, it causes devastation!
When I'd confronted him, he'd also punched me in the eye and blacked it. Yes, that was the 'first' and 'last' time any man got away with physically abusing me...
There was also other shit, but I won't go into detail.

I didn't spend time thinking of getting revenge however. I acted totally on impulse and in the heat of the moment and when I'd seen his car parked outside his new gfs house. The breakup was still fresh, a few days only and I was overwhelmed with anger. I was only 19 at the time.

Afterwards I did feel real bad as I said.

[ashley89]

I don't really see what the point would be of hacking into his account and trying to find information. I mean, even if he DID cheat on you which is completely wrong and he's a jackass, it's in the past, and you guys are broken up now, so it wouldn't help you but instead it'd make you feel worse. I know the idea of doing something damaging sounds funny and trust me, I even thought about doing something like slashing my ex's tires or some shit, but I knew I never would really do it. that just makes YOU look stupid and him look better, which is not the case. the best thing to do is just try to start moving on. it's very hard, me and my ex broke up 2 months ago and I'm still slowly but surely moving through the process. but you really gotta just try so hard not to let him bother you anymore. you're free now, you can do whatever you want =)

[JadenMia]

Yeah, the guy in question in my situation was a bastard too. It wasn't just one or two crappy things. For one, I don't think cheating is just a 'crappy' thing, it causes devastation!
When I'd confronted him, he'd also punched me in the eye and blacked it. Yes, that was the 'first' and 'last' time any man got away with physically abusing me...
There was also other shit, but I won't go into detail.

I didn't spend time thinking of getting revenge however. I acted totally on impulse and in the heat of the moment and when I'd seen his car parked outside his new gfs house. The breakup was still fresh, a few days only and I was overwhelmed with anger. I was only 19 at the time.

Afterwards I did feel real bad as I said.

Oh wow! What a bastard!! Yeah, i would have done the same thing. I have a lilll bit of a problem with controlling my emotions at times.. And if i got cheated on.. Let alone been punched in the eye.. I would have most definitely done the same thing. In the heat of the moment or not This is the men who deserve it. Taking karma into our own hands is sometimes in need for these certain types of men

In the OP case, they shouldnt be spending too much time on thinking about what they could do.. As Ashley89 stated.. Finding out if they had cheated or not.. would only be more painful and not worth it.

[Love&Life]

Truth is painful, but sometimes you need to know to move on. Only when you know the truth you can put things in perspective the way life really is.

[xxazurexx]

Truth is painful, but sometimes you need to know to move on. Only when you know the truth you can put things in perspective the way life really is.

I agree.

You seem convinced he's hiding something, so somewhere along the way he must have given you cause and to doubt his honesty and trustworthiness.

[Love&Life]

"Somewhere along the way he must have given you cause and to doubt his honesty and trustworthiness"

But not always you' re able to pinpoint the cause, you can feel it, but you don't know exactly what it is. Especially when he tells other people that we are together and how happy he is with me, you start to doubt about your own intuition.

Well, I have "hard evidence" now (new account datingsite).

[qwertz]

When i split from my ex, i was angry and heartbroken from the things he did, the devastation he caused and the lives he ruined. To this day(over 2yrs), people are still suffering because of him, i wanted revenge for a long while afterwards. I actually seriously thought about doing something very nasty to him, but then i realised that no amount of revenge would make me or the others he hurt feel better in the long run.
True revenge is often an act of hate and to hate someone is tiresome and unhealthy- I know because I still hate my ex..its not a good place to be.

[Love&Life]

Revenge is sometimes sweeter in the mind.. but sometimes it's also sweet in real...

Quertz, if you still hate him, does this mean that you also love him? (You know the cliche..love&hate...)

[Regnent]

How far? How about not at all? Grow up.

[qwertz]

Revenge is sometimes sweeter in the mind.. but sometimes it's also sweet in real...

Quertz, if you still hate him, does this mean that you also love him? (You know the cliche..love&hate...)

No, not at all. I think people who say there is a fine line between love and hate have never truly hated someone.

[xxazurexx]

True revenge is often an act of hate and to hate someone is tiresome and unhealthy- I know because I still hate my ex..its not a good place to be.

There are also 'crimes of passion'.

I've never hated anyone....I don't have it in me to hate.

[qwertz]

There are also 'crimes of passion'.

I've never hated anyone....I don't have it in me to hate.

How does that relate? Surely crimes of passion are similar to revenge? Because people who want revenge are usually passionate about their reasons behind it.

[xxazurexx]

if you still hate him, does this mean that you also love him? (You know the cliche..love&hate...)

I think that is more the kind of relationship 'can't live with them, can't live without them'....

[xxazurexx]

How does that relate? Surely crimes of passion are similar to revenge? Because people who want revenge are usually passionate about their reasons behind it.

Yeah, crimes of passion are about revenge....I didn't say they weren't.

What I meant was, is that people can stoop to revenge and because they love too much. It's not always about hate and having to hate someone and to take revenge.