Yes I agree he's defensive. I don't seem to have the strength to approach this again at the moment so hVe decided to give myself time to feel better. After today I have gone to my doctor as the blackberry he had I also use to call family from time to time so I saw that she emailed him about a personal thing and he replied to ask her if she could speak on the phone and was emailing her a few times after indicating what he was doing to help her with the personal issue. He was going to a fair bit of trouble/out of his way to help her tbh. So things seem to be moving along between them. I don't have the reserve. Have thought about going away for a long weekend as whilst we are talking, I'm feeling very hazy almost in limbo or something not quite connecting. So more personal / attentive communication from him.