Right blokes, age gaps and open relationships

[Mish]

Two, I am by no means molesting a little boy! Have you ever met any 18 year olds? Hes a damn sight more grown up than lots of 30 year olds I know...and believe me, he is not being taken advantage of.

Ok forget it. Im just surprized there isn't anyone who can even see my point of view here.

I can. I had been with an 18 year old, when I was 6 years older. Believe me, all the maturity signs they seem to display when you are getting to know them, will quickly be lost once the relationship gets more established. If you don't believe me, try it. Not only will you outgrow him emotionally, but he will outgrow you in search for more life experience and diversity. I once too fooled with the idea, that anything that stays perfect for awhile, will probably last, it didn't last long. The 180 came very quickly and for the littlest of reasons. Bottom line from them "I need more diversity before I settle".

My advice is don't invest yourself too much in this. If you don't believe me, then go for it. You will find out for yourself (It will be a new experience).

[tanya78]

That makes a lot of sense. I don't believe this is going to be the romance of the century, but at the moment we are supporting and caring for one another and its just really lovely. Hes not looking to settle down...obviously...which is handy cause neither am i.

I suppose its just a matter of weighing it up isnt it...all the pros and cons. To be honest, I see a lot more positive than negative about us, but the negative is a bloody big thing.

Its not like I like him BECAUSE hes so young. I like him in spite of that. I completely forget how old we both are when we're together, but its getting to the point where everyone basically knows whats going on...its just 'unsaid'. Soon into the new year it'll either be out or over, and if its the first then I know Im going to get some negative reactions...as I have on here. If this relationship is going to stay part of my life for a while then I guess it goes with the territory

[IndiReloaded]

ok, that was all pretty unanimous! haha

We tried ignoring our feelings for about three months before anything happened. As I said, aside from the age gap there are other complications. The gap is ten years, not only that but he's only 18. Even as we get older ten years is going to seem like a lot. Despite the fact that we are so on a par and can talk about literally anything for hours...even enjoy disagreeing with each other!

Just tell me you're not his teacher...

He IS related to your marriage split, even if its after the fact. Nice to know you're still attractive & can catch a man, isn't it? No, its not illegal, but its a bit odd. Shrug.

He's immature (in ways you just don't know yet possibly) & he finds your (relative) maturity attractive. You probably satisfy an Oedipus-thing for him. Keep it light, Cougar, and enjoy it while it lasts. Do not expect anything longterm from this young person, tho.

If you are stupid enough to be considering a longterm relationship w/him let me remind you: Didn't you have enough of trying to get your ex to grow up? Do you really want to go through moving the Boy-to-Man thing all over AGAIN? Just a guess here, but I have a feeling there's a certain comfort in familiarity to you here... except with THIS one, YOU'RE in control, right?

[BFTrick]

Keep it light, Cougar, and enjoy it while it lasts.

Cant agree more with this.

I'm 20 and i think it would be a rush to date a 30 year old woman. rawr.

[IndiReloaded]

I don't think 30 is a cougar.

Fine. Mrs. Robinson then, if you prefer. The idea is the same.

[TheSphinx]

I'll admit that when I was 19-21, I dated several women who were 8-10 years older than I was at the time. In terms of these women being "cougars"...I don't know that I could classify them as such, save that sexually, these women can and will teach you (should you prove unable) to satisfy a woman and will offer amazing sex in return.

However, your relationship seems different in relation to ours. Each of these women were seeing other people, as was I. Our relationships had no official ending, but gradually "faded" as we found other amazing people our own age. While nice to dream about, it's very unlikely a serious, lasting relationship will develop from this. If you're emotionally invested in this relationship to the point of making a post, you're probably too invested not to get hurt from furthering it.

~Sphinx