Can someone decode this guy for me?

[lemonade69]

I still don't understand why he's doing this though. If what I hear is correct, guys don't play games.

[GrkScorp]

I still don't understand why he's doing this though. If what I hear is correct, guys don't play games.

Shoot.. you're not in luck.. my brother was showing me this link yesterday about the "secret society", and it was so hilarious because it's so true..

Basically.. 52% of the population on this planet is part of the secret society..

50% of them are women
2% of them are men

of the 2% of men in the secret society, 50% of them are gay..

So, so far:

50% women
1% strait men
1% gay men

In short, this is a highly sexual society in which the men have sex with women, vice verca, and that 1% of gay men go back and forth from women to other gay men..

The other 48% of men, are not part of the secret society.. They have no idea it exists.. they will beg for sex day in and day out.. and when they find someone who offers them sex, they'll stick with them till the end, and may even get the urge to marry them in fear that if they lose such a person, they'll never have sex again..

The 1% of strait men, "get it".. they know how things (social dynamics, people, emotions, etc) work.. and more importantly, they know how to work their way around them.. They know how to create powerful attraction, strong connection, powerful sexual tension, and make a girl feel completely comfortable to fully let go and surrender to her wild side and enjoy herself as a woman..

In short.. those guys are the "players", (though I don't like that term, because it implies being dishonest and playing games).. and the 48% of guys are the "other guys" or, "average frustrated chumps" AFCs..

Women will have as much sex as they can with the 1% (player) guys, until they start to feel that they're no longer as attractive and bubbly.. so they'll go find a beta-AFC to cling onto and marry before it's too late.. But of that 48%, not all men are strait, some are gay men who simply won't have sex with women..

Now, let's estimate..

of the 50% male population, we have an automatic 1% which we'll call (game-playing).. take out let's say 5% for being bi-sexual/gay.. and take out an other 10% for not being interesting or attractive enough to ever consider.. so we're left with 50-10-5-1=34%

Of those 34% of guys.. let's say that 1/3 of them are cocky to the point where they could care less about the other person's emotions and may even be used to treating women quite poorly.. they have their own unique style of playing games.. so that's an other 11%

So in total.. let's say that out of the whole male population.. you have 12/50% of guys playing some form of games.. to gain a tactical informational advantage over the other person.. that's then 24-25% of the entire male population.. and 34% of the male population which is strait, and not automatically disqualified because they're not interesting or attractive enough..

So, that sounds pretty fair.. 1 out of every 3 guys you meet, are playing some form of games and are not being completely honest and direct with you.. and 1 out of 50 guys you meet, will play a game so tight, that there's no point in trying to beat it.. you'll stand no chance, but more than that, you won't even see it comming.. because his game is so good, you'll think he's one of those "other" guys.. But obviously, it's irrational to think to yourself.. just because a guy doesn't seem like he's playing games, that it must mean he's playing games.. no.. because the chance of that is so small.. by in large.. the majority of the time, you won't even run into a guy who you find interesting and attractive who will be playing games.. PLUS, the majority of the guys who do play games.. are way high up in the cocky gradient.. so unless you find emotionally abusive, insensitive, @ssholes attractive.. that's not something you'll have to worry about..

So, some pointers:

- Go for nice guys.. they don't play games, they're nice.. they love unconditionally, they just ask for love and respect back.. they work under a pure honor system.. they might not be as "sexy and hot", and you may at times feel that you're dating a wimp or a boy instead of a man.. but that's only a small price to pay..

- Don't go for cocky guys.. These guys are either loaded, have some exceptional talent/skill, or are just too fcukn' good-looking for their own good.. some have some combination of the 3.. and some have all three.. But one thing they all have is complete self-awareness of their value.. they know very well where they stand in the dating food-chain, and so, they're accordingly cocky to no end.. It drives 9's and 10's crazy.. I think some get wet just by the level of cockiness alone.. but for girls 8 and under, it's simply too much for the ego the handle, and rightfully so, they should not feel attracted, and should stay away.. because these guys are usually self-absorbed, and could care less about the other person's feelings.. they don't even know what feelings and emotions are.. so there's no such thing as understanding and consideration for them.. only how much of a good time and fun they have.. that's all that matters..

It might sound too simple to be true.. but it's the same thing I tell my girl-friends all the time.. Just go for the nice guys.. if you want to be treated well and respected, loved and adored to no end, just go find a nice guy you like.. and when the relationship is strong enough.. tell him what really turns you on.. help him be that sexy man you want.. and that's pretty much it..

[lemonade69]

Ohh don't worry. Players have tried to run their game on me before, I saw right through them

Ohhh and this guy I'm into is one of the nice guys.

Wow it is truly amazing how little time you need to type up such a long post. I think I got a bit lost in the middle of it somewhere. But the sentence that stood out to me was that 1/3 play games, so I guess what I heard originally was incorrect right?

[lemonade69]

Ohhh and may i also add, the 'nice guys' are great and all, but they NEVER make a move.

Remember that "all the nice men are ugly, all the handsome men are jerks...." thing, it's sad, but I think there is definitely some truth in it.

[GrkScorp]

Lessons from Sparta:

In Sparta, there were three classes:

- Spartan man (alpha)
- Spartan woman
- Helot (beta)

This may shock some, but in Sparta, men felt no reservations in sharing their wife.. it was called "wife sharing", where Spartan women could have sex with any man she saw fit.. Many times, while the Spartan men were away in battle, Helots tried to rape a Spartan woman, who would, funny enough, fight such men off..

A Spartan woman received the same education as a Spartan man (except for military training), and enjoyed the same rights and protection under the law.. They were in antiquity, what women are today..

Their sexual choice was symbolic in the state of Sparta.. A woman who would bear a child, would be considered to be doing a great service to the state-society.. Either by bearing the child of a great warrior.. or of a Helot to help the other functions of society..

In Sparta, the role of a Spartan man, was one.. a Warrior.. There were no other jobs that spartan men held (aside from elders, who were no longer fit to fight and help political positions).. All other jobs were preformed by the Helots and the women of Sparta..

The role of a woman, was to bear and raise the children until age 7, where the children of Spartan warriors would go onto military training, and the children of the Helots would be trained in a trade or craft that their father specialized in..

It got to the point, where women needed help raising the children.. So while the Spartan men were away in battle, this role was served by Helots.. and so, the women needed to find a way to attract and help keep these Helots around them, and exclusive to them, to help raise the children (many times, children that did not even belong to the Helots!)

But they did so under the promise that they would get to have the Spartan woman bear his children one day.. When they were done picking and choosing among the finest Spartan warriors and elite warriors..

So the Helots served this care-taker role, for years, and helped raised the children along with with women..

Fast-track to today.. and you get alpha & beta types.. The urge is still there, it wasn't something exlusive to Sparta, this was the case in tribes all over the developing world.. Where that strong preference for the alpha still exists, and that urge is evident in strong attraction.. a powerful sexual urge.. But these males were alpha for a reason.. skilled hunters, warriors, etc.. that helped society and were useful to society, and society was geared towards creating an urge to help pass those genes along.. But equally as important was the urge to help "raise" those children, to help those genes carry on and survive.. That's what the beta was for.. who in today's world.. served the role of the long-term-provider and emotional-tampon

Today's challenge is not searching for a pure alpha (cocky) or pure beta (nice).. but something of a hybrid between the two (good).. a man who's genes are both worthy of passing on, and who can help in raising the children.. and ensure their survival..

So, while preferences do matter, the guy who's most likely to be more considerate about your feeling/emotions, understanding, sensitive, etc.. is a guy more towards the "nice guy" gradient.. and because of that.. because this is the guy who will love and adore unconditionally, "games" are not part of his vocabulary..

And all you need to do, is put a little shield on him, and show him how to work his sword and spear.. that's really the only cost.. which when you think about it.. is not that much.. because the benefit is emotional satisfaction.. and that's priceless.. and invaluable..

[GrkScorp]

Ohh don't worry. Players have tried to run their game on me before, I saw right through them

Ohhh and this guy I'm into is one of the nice guys.

Wow it is truly amazing how little time you need to type up such a long post. I think I got a bit lost in the middle of it somewhere. But the sentence that stood out to me was that 1/3 play games, so I guess what I heard originally was incorrect right?

Yes and no.. 1/3 of guys play "some form of games".. and the majority, are just cocky guys, who are only interested in how they can maximize the fun they have.. so their game-playing will be primative, simple, unsophisticated, purely-external, and yes.., see-through

The less than 2% of the male population (1 in 50), knows the deal.. and "gets it".. which is why you'll never see it comming.. and you won't stand a chance fighting back.. they'll simply out-game you.. and that's hard to accept.. but that's the way it is..

Good news though.. most of the non-AFC guys who are also not gay.. aren't looking for just sex.. (the stereotype of so-called-"players").. and that has to do with the fact that they have so much sex, that sex is no longer that important anymore.. It gets to the point where, a whole new world opens up for them, and they can clearly see right into you, extract all your values and qualities, judge them, and then either accept (be interested) or reject (not be interested)..

A "player" who is looking for just sex, is usually a guy up in the cocky gradient who finds self-worth validation in the QUANTITY of women he has sex with.. and is just looking to have sex, and move on to the next.. and it's see-through, because it's external-game

A non-AFC, who's not gay, and who's not a cocky "player", is all about inner-game.. which is why you'll never pick up on it.. but you also won't stand a chance, because it's at the point where there's no "thinking", it's just automatic, impulstive, instinctive, and natural.. (but these guys aren't affraid to approach or talk, they always make the first move.. even if you open up the conversation, it's because it's part of their game.. to fuel you with the urge, desire, and motivation to do so, without saying a word to you directly)

Don't bother.. lol.. they're so rare for you to worry about them.. there's no point in worrying about them anyway, because you either qualify or don't.. and if you do, it's not about "just sex".. and if you qualify, there's no point in trying to resist or fight it.. because the more you do, the more sucked in you get..

If the guy you're interested in now is a "nice guy".. then he's just shy.. there's no intentional game-playing.. it might come off as game-playing in your head.. but the reality is most likely that he's just shy.. So you need to make that first initial push.. and give him enough courage and motivation, and show enough interest to make him more comfortable with the idea of taking the lead and control of things..

- I know.. believe me.. how frustrating it is to have a guy you're interested in, too chicken to take the lead or to take control of things, and just wait on you.. But it's only temporary for nice guys.. you have to positively encourage him, until he's comfortable with that role..

Nice guys generally have the wrong idea of what it means to be "nice" or to "respect a woman".. and have NO idea of what it means to be "sexually attractive" or how to "turn-on" the other person.. because they're more focused on being "nice, polite, gentle, submissive".. and are not yet comfortable with the male role of being in control and taking the lead.. You have to make him comfortable with that role.. that's the ONLY issue with nice guys.. that's it..

[IndiReloaded]

GS, that Spartan post was fascinating.

If you are interested in sexual selection, particularly the genetics of mating (and cheating), you might pick up a copy of 'The Red Queen' at your library.

[lemonade69]

Ha, I always knew (and believed in) 'leagues'. Is that what this book is about?

[GrkScorp]

GS, that Spartan post was fascinating.

If you are interested in sexual selection, particularly the genetics of mating (and cheating), you might pick up a copy of 'The Red Queen' at your library.

Thank you Indi,

The result of a childhood misspent on having Ancient Greek civilization and culture shoved down my throat..

What is "The Red Queen" about? (I know you mentioned sexual selection and the genetics of mating; but what is the story behind the book? In what way does it present the subject?)

[lemonade69]

Ok, just one last question, how long should I "positively encourage" him before I give up?

[GrkScorp]

Ok, just one last question, how long should I "positively encourage" him before I give up?

I would give you a time-frame to work with based on how often you see eachother, but honestly.. if within a week (or two, depending how often you see eachother).. you're seriously trying.. you're making an effort, but he's not responding back.. then leave it be after that point..

You should get a FEEL for how he will react.. if he doesn't seem to be encouraged, then just leave it alone after about a week or two of you trying and making that effort..

[lemonade69]

The thing is..he can be 'on' in the morning, and then 'off' in the afternoon........

[GrkScorp]

The thing is..he can be 'on' in the morning, and then 'off' in the afternoon........

On and off from work?

On and off emotionally?

On and off physically?

What exactly do you mean?

[lemonade69]

emotionally. like he'll be attentive in the morning then act like he doesn't notice me in the afternoon

[GrkScorp]

emotionally. like he'll be attentive in the morning then act like he doesn't notice me in the afternoon

Very interesting.. give me a time-of-day estimate on how "morning" and "afternoon" we're talking about exactly..

I have a hunch.. but I just want to be sure..