I think I ruined my chances!

[Primo]

Confidence is good DT, swagger? Well, I'm not so sure. You're on the comeback trail, but I'm sensing some laid back networking might work more efficiently than going out with some cock blocking friends.

[Dogtoast]

You're over eager.

1) You text / call her too goddamn much immediately, and then, for no reason, text her that you're attracted to her, which she's probably figured out after the make-out. It comes across as desperate, she's not responding to you, so to get her to respond, you point out just how much you like her. You did the same thing with the voice mail, its insecure and needy behavior. Like you're trying to bribe her with compliments. "But I like you so much, please respond!"

2) You apologized for texting too much, which just makes shit awkward. Apologize for something big, not for tiny shit> When you apologize for small shit you only draw attention to your missteps and look insecure, as if you'll apologize for anything that could marginally upset her. Don't do it. Whenever you screw something up, ignore it and go on with something else, don't linger on it.

3) You call her too much, like way too much, slow down. That doesn't mean wait 3 days, or those types of games, it just means, don't call her multiple times, leave a message begging her to call back because it would mean so much to you, and then call her again because you can't wait for her to respond to your voicemail.

You are giving this girl so much power over you and thats not good.


Here's what I think happened: you scored with a chick thats hotter than what you normally get and got over-eager. Simple.

So patience, man, patience, especially with the hot ones. You're probably decent at pulling girls, but when you score with hot ones you lose patience and get over-eager. You come across as needy with your behavior. She might decide that despite it all she still likes you and you could still **** her, but you need to slow down. You're seriously hurting your chances, and you're not the only one trying to get at that. So slow it down and play it cool.

(To be completely honest, I think you blew it with this girl from what I've read, but maybe you're really hot or she's just really into you for some reason I'm not aware of.)

Confidence is good DT, swagger? Well, I'm not so sure. You're on the comeback trail, but I'm sensing some laid back networking might work more efficiently than going out with some cock blocking friends.

MVP: Thanks for the response. For what its worth I called her the multiple times the night we met, apparently my buddy and I were trying to track her and her friend down. Then I belligerently texted her some random sh*t. The only message I left was 2 days later, to which she responded with several texts.....for what its worth.

ANYWAYS... yeah I for sure got over eager and will be playing it differently in the future. Since I now know I've got the ability to pull very attractive women, I'll have to get used to it. I'm not trying to sound cocky btw.

Primo: Yeah I've been listening to more hip hop lately so "swagger" got across what I was trying to say...that attitude...ya know?

I've been doing some laid back networking with regards to meeting new women, and I've been staying out of the friend zone with all of them. It's just a matter of going out with them and taking it to the next level. Right now it's more fun to go out with my friends and party as opposed to going on a potentially boring date with some chick just to get laid. Not sure if that makes sense.

Again I appreciate the responses.

[TheWizard]

I think you've learned whatever it is you needed to on this one. You'll do fine in the future. As long you learn from your mistakes it's not a failure.

[Dogtoast]

I think you've learned whatever it is you needed to on this one. You'll do fine in the future. As long you learn from your mistakes it's not a failure.

Yeah I'm not seeing it as a failure at all! I've learned something and had a super awesome night with a hot chick. No regrets.

[Dogtoast]

***UPDATE***

Saturday night I texted her asking her what she was getting into. She replied that she was sick and she would not be going out. I told her "well I guess I'll have to top last Saturday night without you then!"

"haha, have fun" is what she sent back Sat night.

I texted her again on Sunday, I'm bored at work so I'll type them all out.

Me "Hope you're feeling better!

Her: Thanks Slowly but surely. How was your night?

Me: It was good, went downtown with a bunch of people again.

Her: Since you're texting me the next day I take it no hotties??? lol
Her: Tho I'm glad you did

Me: lol...no hotties last night

Her: lol wow I feel so special

Me: You need to get well so you can come out and be the hottie on my arm again....best time I had in a while last sat!

Her: Believe me its been 4 days of laying around the house and I'm bored

Me: I'm sorry. Wish I could just make you feel better! If you need anything let me know.

Her: Aw thanks hun But I dont wanna get you sick before I even get to hang out with you!

Me: Yeah I def don't want to get sick I'm looking forward to hanging out again tho.


SOOOOO Maybe I didn't ruin my chances! It sure seems like I didn't after that conversation.

[sAsAk1]

wow looks like progress
Keep us updated~

[Dogtoast]

wow looks like progress
Keep us updated~

yeah it was a nice surprise... I wasn't expecting much

[Elle_Boogie]

Yeah, you def shouldn't have hit her up that much. So back off for now. Maybe your dude will smash it, but he sounds like a dirtball. Just cuz a dude has game and is good looking, a smart girl will see through his exterior down to the dirt inside. If she's looking for a good guy, she will come back to you. If she's dumb, she'll allow herself to be added to your buddy's long and disgusting list. Time will tell... so just be patient and don't get that hung up ever again!

[Dogtoast]

Yeah, you def shouldn't have hit her up that much. So back off for now. Maybe your dude will smash it, but he sounds like a dirtball. Just cuz a dude has game and is good looking, a smart girl will see through his exterior down to the dirt inside. If she's looking for a good guy, she will come back to you. If she's dumb, she'll allow herself to be added to your buddy's long and disgusting list. Time will tell... so just be patient and don't get that hung up ever again!

Lol, yeah he might smash...and he's definitely a PROUD dirtball....like lets it be known. I'm not too concerned anymore though. I texted this girl yesterday to say whatup and she didnt say sh*t back.

Like I said I'm not concerned, if she's into it she'll come around. I've got others I'm working on so its cool.

[Dogtoast]

Update: (if anyone cares)

So this girl and I have been texting back and forth every 2 or 3 days or so, usually initiated by me. I had thought she figured I was a "player" or a dirtbag, and I made it known that I'm not a dirtball and that I'm a good guy just trying to have fun after a long relationship. Her response to that confirmed my suspicions.

Anyways after I got that out of the way 2 nights ago, she initiated a text with me (which she had never done besides the night we first met) She came out of her shell wanting to flirt and she finally was like " call me if you want". I called her and we talked for 3 hours 'til 3:00 a.m. We talked about everything and she really opened up to me, so I did to her as well. We talked about relationships and she was saying things like "you'll see that I'm very strong willed" for example, and basically just things eluding to us spending time together/hanging out.

I was about to delete this girls number like 3 days ago....glad I didnt. Persistence pays I guess. This girl is sooo freaking hot and might just make me forget about my ex!!!

[Gigabitch]

Wow. You have the tenacity of a pit bull. Good for you, Dogtoast!

[Dogtoast]

Wow. You have the tenacity of a pit bull. Good for you, Dogtoast!

Thanks! I'm pretty pleased with the outcome thus far. We'll see how it progresses.