Mourning the loss of a friendship

[Gigabitch]

Someday you'll both look back on this and she'll be mortified.

[Perryville]

QC, don't you think that when you rented from her that it changed the dynamics of your relationship? Instead of being equals, she was automatically in a superior social position. Also maybe she didn't send you the rebate form, because it would seem like commercialism

[QueenofCorona]

QC, don't you think that when you rented from her that it changed the dynamics of your relationship?

It definitely did. Whats ironic is she's the one who when I was signing the lease said, "I really hope this doesn't change our friendship at all." It was a concern to her at the time.

[Perryville]

See? That shows that she was concerned about it much more than you were. Now she thinks she is your social superior, and probably always will, until something happens to change that dynamic. She seems a pretty shallow person to me.

[QueenofCorona]

Yeah, I don't to blame her husband for it but she was never like that until after they were married. The really sad thing is that she has an older sister who is mentally not with it, she's like a 12 year old wild child stuck in the body of a 32 year old. Her husband is super anal and could never stand her. Well the sister has been kicked out of group home after group home. Literally all group homes in the tri state area will not take her. My friend wanted her to come live with them and the husband was adament, no way. No way until that is they caught wind they'd get a LOT, and I mean a lot of money from the state to take her in. She got drunk once and told me how much. She was giddy about it. It made me sad.

[Gigabitch]

That's disgusting.

[Perryville]

QC, do you really want to be friends with somebody as mercenary as this?

[QueenofCorona]

I don't. Towards the end she was always making comments, like.."Don't you want to buy a house." or "When are you going to get a new car??" Uh, beyotch I have to actually work for my money. Its just sad that a once good person can morph into something like that. Thats what makes it so hard. I know you can't change a person. I just miss what we once had. What she once was.

[Perryville]

Apparently, she was a "greedy bitch", in sheeps clothing. I wouldn't worry about her, QC. You are a much better person than that.

[lovesjoyajm]

I would hate to think of this happening with my best friend. We still have sleepovers and watch movies and stay up till 3 talking when we have time, which is every few months.

I have found that there are certain types of people who don't weather change very well, and other people whom you can see again after years and still have a wonderful time with. In general, the latter are people who have lived through changes in their lives and embraced it, while the former (in my experience) are the ones who haven't left their hometowns. The flexible ones understand that life has its ups and downs, and don't hold that against their friends. The inflexible ones take everything too personally, and they suffer for it.

5 years ago my best friend and I had a discussion about how trying to hold on to what our friendship was in high school would only hurt us in the end. I think it helped our expectations of each other.

[QueenofCorona]

I had to call my old friends husband today, he was my landlord and FAILed to send me my renters form by the end of Jan...oh wait, its end of Feb. What a turd. Freaking makes ME feel like I'm such a burden to call him and dare question him about it. I've been waiting and waiting and wanted to file my taxes weeks ago. Thank god next year I won't have to deal with this again. Peace out, fdskjlfdjlfsjlfdklkuodjuflajdoufdhjfdlkjljoiuonwie wounlbcios!!!!!!

[Asip4u]

Yeah i know what you're talking about Q. I find it so sad that people change in a bad way like that. Once you become so close and many times you have a similar mindset, you think it will never change. I would remind her of what she use to be like and leave her at that.

[SirWagginston]

Pretty much all of my best friends are gone. My childhood buddies all moved out of state when I was in middle school. I made a couple new friends, then, but they went downhill. One is in prison. Another, who was a best friend, had his mother die in a train accident while on vacation with her, and he was just never the same. He fell into drug and alcohol abuse and was kicked out of his house.

I made a couple more best friends in college, but they went downhill, too. One of them I liked right off the bat because he was brilliant. Entering his first year of university, he could already program games by himself. His childhood was filled with neglect and abuse, though, and he broke down one semester while struggling with girl problems. He fell into drug abuse as well, and ended up punching a cop in the face. Oops. He has been in and out of jail/prison cells and mental health institutions since then.

My other good friend, a roommate from Turkey, was cool for a while until he started hanging out with this one guy who is a total douche. He liked that guy because he's really popular, and gets ladies easily, even though he's fat. But he's the type who wins people over with his charismatic confidence, which happens to be intertwined with his douchebaggery. I had fun hanging out with the guy, too, but I couldn't stand the way he treated girls. My friend slowly became less caring of others and more judgmental, until we stopped hanging out.

[Illusional]

honestly it's really hard to stay in touch, or rather on tip top shape with all of your good friends. as you said, many of them develop other relationships and interest, thus we grow apart. i'm good friends with some of my high school friends, yet for those of them that grow out of my life, i replace with other new-found friends. i can't help it, nor do i always like it, but that is how life is. nothing last forever. if you dwell on the past too much, it will eat you up.

raverboy