I don't know what I want out of life.

[Lipp]

And to hell with you women who want to get married at early/mid-20s and have kids straight off the bat, it's like settling down before the journey has even begun. Oh, hey, studies are over, let's explore jobs, places, lifestyles and be completely independent - oh wait, get married, get a job, get a car, get kids, and fly on autopilot until you hit 60 and wonder what the f--k you did wrong.

[Doc Durian]

The trick is to pick a gal 10 years younger than you. That more than adjusts for her "first child by 29" desires.

[Petit Papillon]

Yeah but his gf is older than him, so even if her desire will be to have kids at 29 , it's pretty soon from now. That's why I said he needs to decide if he wants to have kids with her or not. If yes then just few years left for him if not, he can pick younger girl and have cool life another 10 years... Jezu Chryste...

[Doc Durian]

Or she can wait until her thirties

(oh the horror! )

[Petit Papillon]

Yeah but he still can have a plan.Time runs fast,too fast actually.

I'm 20 but I already know when I want to have children, is it so bad to have plans before?

[Doc Durian]

As long as you make the plans with your partner, it's all cool, PP.

But those women who say, "I want my first child at X age, second at Y age, and third at Z age" are a pain the arse.

That's not reality.

[Petit Papillon]

As long as you make the plans with your partner, it's all cool, PP.

But those women who say, "I want my first child at X age, second at Y age, and third at Z age" are a pain the arse.

That's not reality.

I do make those plans with my partner. At least I know we have the same opinion about kids. And I know when I want my first child. When I'll be about 28. Because then I will be possibly graduated,working since 1-2 years and maybe living already in one place for good. See it's not any special plan but I have some target to achieve and I want to make it. And I'm just 20.
The sooner you start to make plans, the better.

[Doc Durian]

If you plan on having children from 28 onwards after more or less attending school for most of your life, why bother with all the extra school?

Has your partner agreed to raise the children while you bring home the bacon?

[Petit Papillon]

What? I plan on having 5-6 years of school. Why should it be me who will bring the food home? We can both work. I'm not planning on being a housewife in the future. And neither is my partner. We are going to be a normal family where mummy and daddy is working .And why bother with extra school? To have better life, don't know where you live but here people need more than a highschool to get a job that will pay for their bills and food. I don't want to struggle for the rest of my life. I also want to give my children a normal life.

[Doc Durian]

What? I plan on having 5-6 years of school. Why should it be me who will bring the food home? We can both work. I'm not planning on being a housewife in the future. And neither is my partner. We are going to be a normal family where mummy and daddy is working .And why bother with extra school? To have better life, don't know where you live but here people need more than a highschool to get a job that will pay for their bills and food. I don't want to struggle for the rest of my life. I also want to give my children a normal life.

So who is going to look after the children? Mummy and daddy are working.

I don't understand your priorities.

[Petit Papillon]

There are grandparents,nannys and day cares... Kids go to school already at 3-4 so it's not a problem. Do you know how many children grew up with both parents working? Well A LOT , since there are places in the world where people can't afford to let one parent sit at home and do nothing.

[Junket]

It's not just kids, it's where and how I want to live.

I can't decide, there's just so many options.

[Lipp]

As long as you make the plans with your partner, it's all cool, PP.

But those women who say, "I want my first child at X age, second at Y age, and third at Z age" are a pain the arse.

That's not reality.

Not to mention the ones who set a definite time-frame to get married.

[Lipp]

Anyways, Fras, one way you could go about it (and Im doing) is sampling different areas, careers and lifestyles, which is relatively easy to incorporate into tertiary studies but becomes trickier the further down the road you go.

[Petit Papillon]

Yes, Lipp is right. You should try different things then. I think many people never find out how they would like to live and where they would like to live. So they change and travel all their lives. That's not good either. I would say, don't put a pressure on yourself. The decission should come to your head in a natural way. Just one day you will wake up and say - ****, this is how I want to live my life!