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Thread: What's the first thing you do when you break up?

  1. #16
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    Why is it not a good idea to bang some guy? I use protection and I tell them upfront that I don't want any sort of attachment. If they choose to get involved with me after that, and STILL expect some kind of commitment on my part, then they made a bad decision. NOT MY FAULT. Until I'm in a relationship with you, I owe you nothing.

  2. #17
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    Personally i am going through something similar as mentioned above. Technically me and my EX broke up 3 and a half months ago which was probably the harshest kinds of breakups. Its the kind where your not mad at each other or hate each other, but you realize that you simply aren't compatible, We both had feelings for each other but we fought soo much that we couldn't fix it and jump right back to it, Then got into the whole FWB deal for 3 and a half months till just this Monday she found a new guy from work shes going to coffee with. Problem is that she mentally checked out of the relationship long time ago while i still had hope so I'm going through the same breakup again. I still don't hate her or am mad at her and one thing keeping me going is looking forward to reconnection with her as friends as we promised each other since we aren't on bad terms. Suggestion Cut contact for two weeks, see how you feel about it, if it still hurts, one more week, rinse and repeat till you are ok, also, go meet new girls/guys, im not telling you to have sex but don't get drowned in depression. Accepting the fact you aren't together isn't the hard part, its the lack of communication is what kills from within. Keep busy, focus on yourself and down the road you will be good friends if you wish Time and distance can cure all.

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    I try, unsuccessfully, to quantify blame so I know where I stand and try to figure out if I'm a bad person or not. Then I spend years looking at the drawing board wondering what I'm supposed to do to move on. I theorize about what's wrong with me, try to subtly fish for compliments and occasionally become desperate for something to prove to me I have a reason to believe in myself. I live in fear of being patronized for confiding in anyone and eventually get into therapy.
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    My god, what have we done to you?

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by VincenzoG91 View Post
    I start with Denial and then some Bargaining. Then I go back and forth between Anger and Depression, ending with a lengthy period of mild and intermittent Depression. Eventually, there is Acceptance, but I'm not sure when that happens exactly because if I think about it, I move back to Depression.
    Hahahaha! Nice^.
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  5. #20
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    Let's see... What did I do today. She texted me saying she can't stay in a relationship because she loves me but likes someone else at the same time, so we broke up. Meaning, we love each other. So..... it still hurts, breaking up and all. My first relationship you see. I... listened to songs. Burn by USHER really helps. It expressed the feelings in my heart so well. Anyways, music, focus on other stuff, and... if you can, not contact her at all. It depends on how deep your love for her is really. I don't think mine's that deep because it doesn't hurt THAT much. It hurts but, not depression... I dunno.

  6. #21
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    Depends. End of Feb broke up with OH after 8 years together and 6 of those living together. My decision. Immediately went onto dating websites, had a few dates and found a woman who blows my mind totally.

  7. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boisdevie View Post
    Depends. End of Feb broke up with OH after 8 years together and 6 of those living together. My decision. Immediately went onto dating websites, had a few dates and found a woman who blows my mind totally.
    What dating websites did you use? I tried some but they seemed to be total shite!
    You never know what you've got, until it's gone...

  8. #23
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    Typically I turn on some loud adrenaline pumping music and I dance from room to room. Then I spruce myself up and hit the bar grinning ear to ear. I think the only thing that beats dumping a girl is picking a new one up.
    God, so atrocious in the Old Testament, so attractive in the New--the Jekyl and Hyde of sacred romance.
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    If people are good only because they fear punishment and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.
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  9. #24
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    Absolutely batter my body for a couple of weeks with exercise, couple that with drinking as much as possible, and hey presto! im over him.
    Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

  10. #25
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    see the thing is with me is that i have to cry. i can't try to make myself feel better. so i don't avoid it. i go out and buy ice-cream and watch a really sappy movie and cry and cry and cry. usually after that i feel better.

  11. #26
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    i booted up the the nearest gaming platform and lost myself for a day or to so when i did think about thing my head was clear and not full on emotions but again beer is a good option. the thing thnta really got me back my mojo if you will is going out with friends and having a really good time for you

  12. #27
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    was with her for 5 years, broke up 10 months ago.
    when she broke up with me, I didn't sleep, drank every weekend, worked a hell lot, worked out a hell lot. never really picked up new girls, but had feelings for a couple girls here and there, nothing more. she would contact me here and there, and the BIGGEST mistake I would make is replying back and hanging out with her. Being "friends" never works out when the break up is still fresh and when she has a boyfriend already. I chose to cut contact, and I'm feeling much better about myself. the thing that made me make my decision easier to stop talking to her for real was when we went for coffee once and she told me that I was a wreck without her and that she felt independent without me. It was as if she thought it was okay to tell me that I seemed like a wreck, when I seemed to be doing better than her. I proved her wrong, I'm better then I ever was with her. SO YEAH..

    friends, drinking/clubbing, work, workout.. yep.

  13. #28
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    Blame myself for everything going so horribly wrong. Write a final apology/ good bye email, in hopes that my ex won't hate me so much.

    Then start no contact and sink into a seemingly never ending cycle of despair, self-hatred and despondany. Wondering how he could love me so much one minute and hate me the next, why I had to act the way I did and why he can't forgive me...

  14. #29
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    Commence merrymaking with some good brews and watch some good movies or cartoons.
    I will do my best to reply with an educated, humble and honest answer. Ultimately, it is up to you whether you want to listen to my advice or ignore it completely. Sometimes, my advice may be wrong; occasionally, it will be right. Regardless, I want to do my best to give people answers they are seeking.

  15. #30
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    Close my door and curtains and watch Jeremy Kyle for about 5 days until I have to venture out for more supplies. Then no more moping, it's time to get back on that bike, new shoes new dress and town it is with the girls... and hopefully as soon as possible the nearest guy to shag, nothing says it's over like waking up next to a stranger!

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