This is a white lie, but I needed to make a point

[xxazurexx]

And $400 for someone to clean her house weekly? Can't she clean herself?

$1000 facial? She could have botox for that!!! LOL

She's proper taking you for a ride (no pun intended).

[Ric]

She is now used to you spending loads on her.
Now you need to carry on the lie or tell her the truth. In any event, make sure she isn't with you for the money.

[xxazurexx]

She is now used to you spending loads on her.
Now you need to carry on the lie or tell her the truth. In any event, make sure she isn't with you for the money.

I actually think that is why he's done what he has done.

[Ric]

I actually think that is why he's done what he has done.

And he needs to hang into that for some time. A few days won't do. She needs longer to prove herself.
Though, her initial reaction seems very positive.

[sookie6]

And he needs to hang into that for some time. A few days won't do. She needs longer to prove herself.
Though, her initial reaction seems very positive.

Her reaction is most always apologetic and positive...did she not say once already that she was going to get a job...where is it?

[HeartIsAching]

You HAD to lie?!

No! You were too cowardly to tell her the truth. Do you have any idea what will happen to your relationship when she finds out? Because she WILL find out... Your relationship will die. Not all at once, but little by little, starting that day, because that's the day the trust died.

[sweetkissesforu]

And $400 for someone to clean her house weekly? Can't she clean herself?

$1000 facial? She could have botox for that!!! LOL

She's proper taking you for a ride (no pun intended).

Sounds like he spoiled her to get her and now it is catching up to him
money dont buy happiness bottom line love buys happiness if it is true

[girl68]

This is twice now you've screwed up the exact same way. It's stupid she can't pay for her childrens daycare, nor the cleaning lady, nor the disney trip but charges 1000 for a facial. This woman is incredibly stupid and IS taking you for a ride. She's a closet gold digger. Defend her not, I know you'll never see it, you refuse to.

For someone who *seems* wise you sure do screw up A LOT.
And I agree there was not a damn thing "white" about that lie.

[Anturo]

Ok so let me point out somethings and maybe you can see the red flags.

1) You are both recently divorced? (Try some time to fix yourself before moving on the the next relationship)

2) She is lazy as hell. How so you ask? $400/mo in cleaning and now $580/mo child care but she doesnt work? So let me get this straight she is Home all day. But cant take care of her own kids and needs somone to clean her house for her?

3) $1000 for a facial. Dont know what else to say about that except. Abusurd!

4) You are lying to her already.

Dont worry though things will get better because your not a doormat and you can stand up for yourself?!?! Or can you?

[qwertz]

Soooo, she doesnt work because she has kids, but you pay for their childcare in the afternoons so she gets a break, and because she goes for $1000 facials in this break she doesnt have the time to clean the house so you pay for this to be done, too.

No wonder she doesnt want to lose you!!!

She is telling you what you want to hear. You should take away the credit card, the cleaner and the childcare. But you should be honest as to why you are doing it. If she leaves you then so be it, i know i wouldnt want to be married to a gold digger.

Oh, if you do break up, make sure you get the ring back!!

[girl68]

Umm Qwertz... she's NOT a gold digger!

/sarcasm

[doppelgaenger]

So my fiancee and I are to be married this November. I have been somewhat stretched thin financially, due to the divorce and my lower-paying job. I still bought her a $20,000 engagement ring (that's another story). I pay ex-wife $2,000 per month alimony and $3,000 per month child support (2 kids). I pay $400 a month for a cleaning lady to clean my fiance's house once a week.

What the FÜCK, man?!?!?

Lower-paying job? Shit, you'd be fücking rich if you didn't waste your money like you do.

[Kaius]

I'm not trying to be defensive, as things are what they are. But let's be fair. This woman loves me....and would love me the same even if I never spent a dime on her. She is just very eccentric, and may not view money like everyone else. She has no motives. I enjoy spoiling her because I feel she deserves it, and she is always grateful. She has never asked me for anything... I always offered, as I feel is it my duty to meet her needs. I am her man... She has 2 very difficult children, one of which is borderline special-needs type. She never had help when she was married, so now I feel it is my duty to relieve her a bit with the cleaning lady and the after-school care. She does not sit at home eating bon-bons all day. She is in medical school. After she graduates, and becomes a doctor, she will be working full time. She's not making any excuses. She truly needs me, and I will not let her suffer. She takes very good care of me. Because she is a former fitness instructor, she has spent much time and effort improving my health. She cooks and plans all my meals during the week, and keeps me motivated in staying healthy. So this isn't an unbalanced relationship. Just because I contribute more money doesn't mean she is a moocher. She is not. And if I didn't lose my job last year, this wouldn't even be an issue. I just don't want to lower my standards... I always believe my woman deserves the best. She has implied repeatedly that, if she didn't have small children, she would be perfectly happy living in my small one-bedroom apartment. It's more than enough space for us. I think my white lie helped curb her spending for now. When someone puts you so high on a pedestal, it's difficult to let them down. I don't intend to disappoint her. I truly see that her intentions are pure. That's why I am so committed to her.

[waitimConfused]

dayummmm. JUst wait till those kids start calling u daddy, and want you to buy them Abercrombie, and Hollister. This sounds liek an epic issue, and your actions shouldn't be decided by an online forum. If you divorce her after your married, thats Two sets of alimony and child support. You'll be up the creek. It sound like your in pretty deep already, Get married, make her get a job, lie lie lie. Or you could try to make her understand, that her spending limits what you could do for your children.

[Junket]

His symptoms lead me to believe he has The Shining Knight Syndrome.

"I will not let her suffer." Hahaha, because not having a facial and a maid is the equivalent of suffering.

You are deranged.