How would you characterize this person / situation?

[RobertWQ]

You want this to move forward stop being a nice guy....just have a boner and lean into her say that you find her totally hot. Once she feels it, she will get very excited that you have the balls to express your desire for her. Probably something her BF has never done for her.

Is this a serious post?

[surfhb2]

I actually think both of these posts and perspectives are right.


I think she IS into me. And I think she probably makes fun of me behind my back in part because she doesn't want to fully let on to her boyfriend that she is ... and in part because it's kind of this antagonism from a relatively poor, immigrant towards the white, affluent person. Feeling a sense of power from thinking you're getting something over on them. Like graffiti or something.

And I also think the other point of view (Michelle's, etc.) is also correct. She IS using me as an emotional shoulder to lean on. The character of her emails indicate this. She often asks me for help on something, although I think at times at least she is just making an excuse to write to me (she'll sometimes ask for things she really doesn't need). But she also does talk about how she can be unmotivated at times because of how busy her schedule is, and then I encourage her, etc. So kind of a classic nice-guy situation too.

I'm going to stick it out until it's time to go, I guess. I DO like her and I like her company. I also think that there isn't anything wrong with helping someone when you can and it doesn't cost you very much. I mean after all, I am going into medicine, that is the entire purpose of people in this field, is to help vulnerable people or people in need of what you can do.

I guess once she starts talking to me about her and her boyfriend's problems will be when I decide it's gone too far towards the nice-guy scenario.

And I don't expect her to leave her boyfriend of 2.5 years for me. I'm guessing it will be pretty hard to compete with his in-person presence and the length of time they've been together over email. And besides, I wouldn't want her to leave him unless she's really unhappy or she really likes me that much more and is ready for something new. And I don't think it's at that point between them.

Skeptical hit on the most important point though about this whole thing that makes it different, and it's this: "You obviously like her and like to be around her. You don't find this in many people."

You are a fuccking loser. Lol

[smackie9]

Is this a serious post?

Yes it is. It's been done to me, and I thought it was impressive (hehe)

[RobertWQ]

You are a fuccking loser. Lol

I'm not even going to address this. Although out of curiosity, what do you do for a living?

[surfhb2]

I'm not even going to address this.

I know.....because you don't listen

[RobertWQ]

I have listened. I am just making a judgment call.

Look. This girl is really sweet. She's poor. I am pretty sure she has an abusive family. She's really bright, she wants to succeed. I've done well in my classes. She finds me encouraging. Yeah she may be misbehaving in some ways. I'm not just going to ditch her. I'm doing something kind for her because I can and it's not taxing for me. It's the way it is.

[surfhb2]

Then why come here and ask? One person (count them) agrees with you in this thread..... The rest are calling you out and laughing at your stupidity.

Have fun being single....you pick and choose what you want to hear

[surfhb2]

I'm not even going to address this. Although out of curiosity, what do you do for a living?

I'm a broadcast engineer Why?

[Skeptical]

I don't understand the mean comments!
why do you people have to be so mean to him????

[RobertWQ]

I agree. And geez it's not like I don't have other girls interested in me. I do. I mean that very pretty girl from my chem lab started calling me after we saw each other and took the train again. I just happen to like this girl more in terms of feeling like we're similar and stuff. I also think I have a sympathetic streak for people in need. Again, I am going into medicine so I think that's a good thing.

But yeah, it's possible I've been overdoing it.

And to surfhb, I just want to compare life outlooks with life outcomes.