Am I crazy?

[searock]

Do you still have a crush on your co-worker, think about her all the time? How is that not emotionally cheating?

[Am I crazy?]

searock,

have a wonderful evening, thanks for asking.

[searock]

Sorry to hear that...

[Am I crazy?]

searock,

nothing to be sorry about, all is well, just not discussing it anymore here.

[IndiReloaded]

LOL, what a troll. However, on the chance you are not (or someone else with a similar issue reads this):

I already posted, there are experts to be found on this topic. Will Harley's site will give you good advice, based on informed research from many couples experiencing similar issues to yours. He would tell you to break off with your EA 'friend' and with solid data to back his advice. But hey, what do experts actually know, right? *Every* affair couple thinks their situation is "special", its de rigeur for the mindset, in fact.

Or, as a former well-respected pro who used to post here would say: friends don't want to f**k friends. You aren't friends, however much you convince yourself otherwise. Your path is a, research-proven, high-risk one for the destruction of your marriage.

Good luck and go away. Carry on at: www.onlywhatiwantothear.com

[Am I crazy?]

Indi,

Thanks for your concern but I have everything under control. goodbye

[Wakeup]

... Close the Pod Door Hal ...

[IndiReloaded]

Bye! Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

... Close the Pod Door Hal ...

Haha, nice.

[michelle23]

because you dont like the word affair or cheating. you prefer to delude yourself into believing your perfectly innocent, a saint who has done nothing wrong.

emotional affairs happen because people like you refuse to even acknowledge that they exist. people who do their research and understand how to avoid falling into these traps normally dont. its something that can literally happen to anyone especially if they have not heard of it and think cheating is black and white

emotional cheating is a huge grey area for most people

i respect and admire the fact that you have not ever physically cheated and never will but i do not like your old school beliefs. its typical of men your age to think all this talk about "emotional cheating" is nonsence and ignore the problem until it literally gets too big to ignore. the reason i mention your age is coz im talking about your generation specifically.

i think it would benefit you greatly to unfold your arms, take the frown off your face, open your ears and listen. stop being so defensive. its a sure sign of guilt

[IndiReloaded]

Michelle - he's gone I think, but fwiw to the dialogue I actually don't subscribe to the whole 'emotional affair' thing being cheating.

But where the rubber meets the road is that it is proven that EAs (or whatever you want to call them) are very destructive to the primary relationship and do lead to physical affairs if left unchecked. Personally, that's the reason I frown on them.

It's like hanging out with crackheads. Sure, you *may* not become an addict, but why would you choose to associate with people in this way?

[Wakeup]

It's "typical of men his age" Link please.

[stev123]

Women please be nice.

[Wakeup]

We're being sweet as honey, honey.

[michelle23]

its just my opinion that the older generation of men think cheating is just about sex unless they have done their homework and understand what EA,s actually are.

indi i dont agree that that is the only reason they are destructive coz they can and do lead to physical cheating.

its also that they delude the person having them into pushing their partner away, noticing all their flaws-things that wernt an issue before, passing blame and guilt on their partner, thinking they are not "in love" with their partner, that other person is their soul mate, eventually leading up to "should i leave my partner"

and once they do that, reality sinks in, they come back down to earth, take off their rose-tinted glasses and realize they have f**ked up their whole life.

if it doesnt get to the point where they leave, those rose-tinted glasses rarely come off and they live the rest of their lives wondering is the grass greener.

its so destructive and can destroy a happy marriage even if no physical cheating ever occurs.
that is why it would be enough for me to leave and never look back

[lalalita]

As a Father and Husband, I think you need to let go of feeling young and "excited".