Parents trying to get me to cheat on my gf

[Raze]

You're screwed too! "you'll see". You're an individual there is no one in the entire world who should know EVERYTHING about you, except yourself.

It's not exactly like I'm giving away my social security number.

[IndiReloaded]

I'm not fighting with you. Everything I said is true and from personal experience. Being offended is your choice, Raze. You seem to look for offense as a regular activity, look at how you chose to get your back up even re: your own parents.

[Raze]

I'm not fighting with you. Everything I said is true and from personal experience. Being offended is your choice, Raze. You seem to look for offense as a regular activity, look at how you chose to get your back up even re: your own parents.

You've basically just insulted everyone who got into graduate school by saying it's not that hard.. there are some people who worked their asses off trying to get into graduate school. Yes, of course, I'm going to take offense to that. I'm not going to waste time telling you how hard some of us have to work.

I'm pretty sure I had reason to get offended by my parents for saying that.

I hate to burst your bubble, but everyone has different personal experiences so think before you go on telling someone, "oh, it wasn't that hard to do."

That would be like saying, "Oh, getting that job isn't that difficult (even though the person spent his entire life up to that moment trying to get it)." Seriously...

[IndiReloaded]

Okay. Some people have to work hard to get into grad school. You are right. Not sure how that rates you intelligence wise, then vs. those who didn't find it hard? It might even mean they know things you don't??

Hmmm.

[adam95]

cmon raze theres no need to take offense from indie. we're all here just to give our thoughts on peoples situations. if this is their thought then just read it and leave it if you dont like their advice.
but yeah i get offended when my dad says crap about my girl. thats just natural.

[Raze]

Okay. Some people have to work hard to get into grad school. You are right. Not sure how that rates you intelligence wise, then vs. those who didn't find it hard? It might even mean they know things you don't??

Hmmm.

If I posted that, then I'm sorry for saying that.

[girl68]

aww cmon. yes i understand there are limits but the situation raze is isn't one of them. Like in my situation, my dad literally despises my gf but i dont let her know that. she has figured it out as dad doesn't even try to be nice around her but i dont tell her to her face that my dad hates you.

You didn't say exceptions you BOTH said EVERYTHING. I took it as face value. And I agree he never should have told her. That's like saying my parents hate you but oh well. I dunno my guy told me this I'd be insecure and horribly afraid of them sound pleasent? Not really.

[Raze]

You didn't say exceptions you BOTH said EVERYTHING. I took it as face value. And I agree he never should have told her. That's like saying my parents hate you but oh well. I dunno my guy told me this I'd be insecure and horribly afraid of them sound pleasent? Not really.

Sorry, I didn't mean everything like credit card, social security, or any of that financial information that could be stolen. I was just trying to make the point that I like being honest with someone and I don't like holding things back.

For example, if I got an STD, I would tell her "hey, I just found out I have this."

I actually did tell her that I would get tested for her and I told her I was stressing out over it. I turned out to be negative yesterday and I told her that I came back negative.

I told her that I have OCD, which I get from my mom. She has OCD too.

@ Indie

You have to realize that I've stuggled with academics throughout my entire life and I had to work my ass off even to get into college (which I never thought I would). When I got to college, I did pretty well but never imagined that I would go to Grad School because my grades were not excellent but I tried my hardest. Teachers in elementary school thought I was stupid, wouldn't make it, etc. etc. I actually had one teacher who really didn't like me for some reason and she was out to get me as in going out of her way to make sure that I fail. She ended up losing her job and going to a mental institution (which is what I found out after I left that school). I graduated, went to college, and then professors started believing me and telling me that I need to be different from the fray and they believed that I could succeed. Bottom line from my tangent is that I've just had a rough time with it and I take offense to people saying it's not that hard because for me it was.

[adam95]

yeah i didnt mention exceptions. sorry
i know it would be unpleasant which is why i dont tell my gf that. but my mom loves her to death so she dont feel so uncomfortable.

[IndiReloaded]

So, what was your motive in telling your GF your parent's opinion of her? Did you consider all the consequences of telling vs not before opening your mouth? You don't see how you have possibly complicated their future interactions? I mean, what if your parents opinion changed in the next few months/year? All I think you have done is needlessly embarrassed your parents, shamed your GF and you did it largely b/c you couldn't control your emotional upset at the idea your parents might not 'approve' of your choice.

Compulsive honesty for its own sake is actually a sign of a lack of self-control.

Know thyself, Raze. Honesty is also about not lying to yourself, kiddo.

[girl68]

I still don't think you boys get it. You were both advocates for telling your gf's everything (I'm not talking about saring SIN with others). I'm saying that's a terrible terrible idea. Yes, honesty is key but there are lines that shall not be crossed. Lets say I'm looking at a man dick through sweatpants you know how there's always that bulge there and he asks me what I'm thinking about do you think I should share that I'm thinking about how big his dick would be hard? HELL NO. There are some things you should most definately not tell your partner. That is my mere point and the Sr. members point as well.

[Raze]

So, what was your motive in telling your GF your parent's opinion of her? Did you consider all the consequences of telling vs not before opening your mouth? You don't see how you have possibly complicated their future interactions? I mean, what if your parents opinion changed in the next few months/year? All I think you have done is needlessly embarrassed your parents, shamed your GF and you did it largely b/c you couldn't control your emotional upset at the idea your parents might not 'approve' of your choice.

Compulsive honesty for its own sake is actually a sign of a lack of self-control.

Know thyself, Raze. Honesty is also about not lying to yourself, kiddo.

My motive was that I wanted to be honest with her. I didn't shame my gf. If anything, she likes me more because of what I did. I told my parents my gf is wonderful and to trust me in my decisions (pretty much telling them to lay off).

Yes, I thought of all the consequences. Haven't you been reading? I want to be honest with her.

Now you're accusing me of lying to myself? lol. What is with you?

[adam95]

yeah i get your point guys. but my gf is already as comfortable as she can be with my mom. infact moms wondering when i'll get married!
but in raze's situation i dont know. how did ur gf react to this anyway raze?

[IndiReloaded]

My motive was that I wanted to be honest with her. I didn't shame my gf. If anything, she likes me more because of what I did. I told my parents my gf is wonderful and to trust me in my decisions (pretty much telling them to lay off).

Yes, I thought of all the consequences. Haven't you been reading? I want to be honest with her.

Now you're accusing me of lying to myself? lol. What is with you?

Actually, now I just think you are ignorant of the concept I am describing. You didn't answer my question, you are just repeating yourself. Your motive for your honesty is... to be honest??

I already said honesty for its own sake is immature. You can't understand this simple concept at 23 years old?

[Raze]

I still don't think you boys get it. You were both advocates for telling your gf's everything (I'm not talking about saring SIN with others). I'm saying that's a terrible terrible idea. Yes, honesty is key but there are lines that shall not be crossed. Lets say I'm looking at a man dick through sweatpants you know how there's always that bulge there and he asks me what I'm thinking about do you think I should share that I'm thinking about how big his dick would be hard? HELL NO. There are some things you should most definately not tell your partner. That is my mere point and the Sr. members point as well.

Hmmmmm... I tell my gf man that chick has big boobs, I love boobs. What's wrong with that? It doesn't mean that I'd leave her for that girl? It just means that I like boobs. lol.