All right guys and gals, I've decided to post about my situation and get some feedback. I was kinda inspired by Tommy's thread. So I've been separated from my gal for about 2-months now. One day, after a stupid argument, she snapped and left me. Let me start at the beginning, the very beginning.
We met over 4yrs ago on a website, collegeclub.com. We were about a 2-minute walk from each other so we met for lunch. She didn’t come off like the girl of my dreams but I had recently been dumped so I was looking to get back in the saddle. That week we hit it off and started dating. It wasn't very long at all when we started spending every night together at her place or mine. That continued through the school year and for the summer she moved into my mother's house with me. After another two semesters of college, I was graduating... We moved back in with my mom while I saved to buy us a house. Sometime that summer she decides she couldn't take it anymore and left for an apartment. She has this thing with needing her own ‘stuff’ and ‘place’ as she grew up with siblings. On top of that, Mom and her didn't get along well. I could either go with her or move on. After begging and pleading her to stay, I finally was forced to cave in and move to the apartment with her. I really hated the idea of throwing away money on rent but I didn't want to lose her. She was cold as ice through this process until I caved in. It amazed me how she could just turn off all emotion like she did. Anyway, we lived together in apartments for a year and a half and I finally saved enough for a house. She wanted to graduate first, so we killed another 6 months at my mom's house. Last December we moved into the house I bought for us in a city about 15 miles away from where we called home. She wasn't happy with leaving but it was something I really wanted and you just can’t afford houses there. She didn't have to pay any of the mortgage, and I even helped to save additional money so she could go to grad school.
Then came the weekend of Apr 23rd this year. I was angry because she wouldn't go on a 4x4 trip with some friends and me. It was just a few weeks ago; I didn't go on the trip so I could join her visiting her folks back home. She wanted to go to a long-lost friend's wedding but I thought it was only fair that she went with me on the trip. I made a big stink out of this issue (I now wish I hadn't). Just a day later, she went to stay at her brother's for the night. Two days later she told me she was moving out. She said she wanted to be back in the city where she went to school (15 miles away from the house). I slept on the couch and she left the next day. I asked her to stay at her brother's for a few more days and make sure that's really what she wanted. During this time, I told her I would give up my house and come with her. Keep in mind how important the house is to me. At that point she wasn't interested. Apparently, there was more to this scenario than the house and the city we lived in. As she had been years before, she once again has shut off all emotion and is cold as ice.
Over the next few weeks she came to the conclusion that she needed some time and space as she fought some 'inner demons.' She wanted 6-months. She wasn't even willing to promise me a 2nd chance after that time; but I could wait and see if I wanted. She agreed to keep Wednesday nights open for me and her to hang out together and said we could talk about 'us' once a month and see where things stand. I had told her I was worried because I didn't want to wait 6 months for her just to find out she had given up no us 4 months before. I don't like being alone, so if all is lost, I'd rather be moving on and finding someone who could appreciate me.
After two months of this, I couldn't take the pain anymore. Last Wednesday, I told her this and she didn't try to stop me from leaving. Again, she was cold as ice and insisted she didn't want to be with anyone right now. If I had to leave, then that's what I had to do. I warned her, that if I went out and found someone new, all would be lost. I don’t make a habit of leaving a new gal for no reason; just because someone who broke my heart realized they made a mistake.
So it's been less than a week since that time. I was hoping she would realize her mistake but she hasn't. She did send me a text message on Sunday just to say Hi. That made me happy cause at least she was thinking about us. I don't know where I should go from here. All I know is I don't want to burn any bridges. I don't let love go easily. I want you to know I am 100% certain she is not cheating with me. We lived together and there was simply no time for her to do something like that. I also know her well enough to understand she does have some demons from her childhood that she could confront. I would be more than happy to give her time to do this; but what I can't stand is the fact she won't even promise me a second chance down the road.
I should also add that I've realized there were some other problems with our relationship, but all I want is a chance to work them out. I also want to add that just a week before everything fell apart, she was pushing me to get married!!