Hi everybody!
I really need a lot of opinions to understand how to wrok things out, i really feel screwd up at the moment.
I'l describe my postion as breafly as possible.
It's 6 months i mooved to Australia from Italy with my boyfriend and a friend of uors.
I'm with my actual boyfriend from 9 years now, we are 24 and 25 so we know each other from high school.
Now we are living in a sharehouse with another australian girl, and its our first real xperiance living together.
I work as an Architect for a pretty big company from 4 months and my boyfriend works as an Auto-elettrician.
We are having a few problems living together and are arguing quite heavely and often.
The problem is i think i fell for my 30 year old collegue, i wrok with him everyday and he sits right next to me.
I'v noticed him from the first day of work, i thought he was a cute guy but seriously insicure (thing that i did not find attractive at all). I was safe.
Then we happen to be in the same team. No problems until a month ago.
I'm really starting to feal something i can't explain, we don't really talk mutch about ourselves, but his whay of beeing just makes me crazy, he is adorable. I don't have any real sexual atraction towards him, i really have the will to know more about him.
I just starded thinking about him at home a bit too often, especially when i argued with my actual boyfriend.
I think this guy is very shy, but it could be he is gey or just trying to be nice with me at work (i don't really know if he is interessed in me, not for shore).
He actualy said a cupple of things that made me think he could be interssed in me such as..."well i mooved here with my partner.....but we kind of broke up although we still live together"....then he got really embarassed and said he shouldn't have said that.
He knows i have a boyfriend becaose i'v mentioned it a cupple of times at work.
He looks really embarassed when i look at him and i walk passed him through corridors, and if there is the chance dooring meetings, he sits allways next to me, or trys to talk to me. He allso asks frequently hows my work going.
Yesterday then someting happened that scared me and made me think quite a lot on my actual relationship.
During tha day our boss brings a cake for his birthday and we start talking, he does photography in his spare time and i asked him to show me his work.
At the end of the day he sends me the link of his website (i really found his work awsom, he is really talented and dedicated) i start talking to him about it and ended up talking for an hour about his photography and my university in italy... then i asked what he was going to do for the week end.
He aswered at first, eating his words, and i'm pretty shore he became red in face. I wouldn't bet on it but i think he said something as "i wanted to go and see james bond with you" but i'm not shore, i asked him to repeat and he just said he was probably going to see james bond.
And there something really wiered happened to me, i started to say random things and I started to tremble, and wile talking my body was just mooving by its own. i got dressed up and got ready to go. It was quite late. The atmosfere was embarassing, i could feel it. I said goodbay to everybody and took off, still trembelling and trembelled for another 10 minutes outside the office.
Ok so this is the situation, i know i sound like a 12 year old girl and i should be a grown up professional Architect (but i do not have a very good emotional experience).
My first question is, am i compleatly on the wrong trak or is allso this guy interessed in me?
The second advice i would like is more complex.
Well i still feel something for my actual boyfried and i'v spend most of my life with him, i'v built something with him and we came here in Australia together to start a new life toghether. I'm really afraid to loose all that i'v built with him trough theese years for something i do knot know.
But theese feelings i have scared me. I should not feel this way if i'm in love.
I'm thinking, should i just block this thing and go on with my actual boyfriend? and risk to be unhappy seeing some of the things that are happening lately.
Or should i give a chance to this guy and try to knwo him better? And be honest with my boyfrind and explain him everithig?
On his website there was allso his e-mail and phone number, should i ask him for the phone number or just write to him?
Oh and i do not want to loose my job either hahaha!
I hope i'v been cleare enought i have so mutch going on in my head at the moment=)
Just help this little poor winging Architect clear her ideas! gosh i'm rediculous!
But i'm really getting stuffed up!
Please help and thanks for reading!