college girl

[mcpuck20]

Im not sure if im completely ****ed here or not...Im 20 and in college and I met this girl in class a few months ago. As the semester went on i got to know her better and starting talking to her more. Over Christmas break i tried to stay in contact just enough but not too much, unfortunately i was most often the one initiating conversation. When my hockey team visited a school near her home I left her tickets, and brought her back a t-shirt from our christmas trip to Wisconsin. When we got back to school I thought i had made progress and she was very friendly for a few days but when the weekend came and we all went out she was very distant and uninterested in me at all. When i asked her roommate, who is a mutual friend, she told me that my girl is very shy and didnt know how to respond to it and that i was making her uncomfortable. When i discussed this with her later that night, she told me that she thought it meant alot that i cared about her but that she wasnt interested.

1) The guy she was hooking up with/was interested in is a complete idiot, dumb as they come, white guy who wears a flatbrimmed hat to the side

2) Ive always had an issue with being too nice and it appears Ive allowed this to get me again.

Is there anything I can do to fix this or am I out of luck? (as opposed to my current plan of ignoring her)

[cmacattack1]

Nothing wrong with that man. While I know you are a nice guy and you know you are a nice guy, she probably just took it as coming on a little strong. I mean you guys were just on talking terms and you were giving her tickets and buying her gifts? You did it out of the kindness of your heart but she probably took it as you wanted something in return. Hence her feeling uncomfortable. Girls get guys coming at them all the time they are always on the defensive. Talking to her roommate of course got back to her and it sounds like you are really trying very hard. Girls for the most part just aren't attracted to that. They want to be the ones that like the guy first, and then get swooped off their feet.

What's your intentions here? You thought you were making progress...towards what? A relationship? Hook up? How well do you even know her? Do you just talk to her in class? I would take it easy here and slow down on what you are doing. Don't ignore her, but when you run into her still be friendly and nice for a little while. Ask her how she is, make small talk and when you hit that lull, leave it as it is. Slow it down a bit, be patient, and when you are getting the positive vibe again take it from there. This could be a while (month, couple months, etc.). Hang out with her outside of class and really get to know her and have her feel comfortable around you.

I remember I liked a girl and she actually liked me at first. I came at her too strong with lots of (drunk) texts and asking her to do stuff because my friends told me too. If I was patient, it could have worked out. You gotta be too.

Don't worry about who she is hooking up with and so on. There isn't really much you can do about it. My ex's new boyfriend looks like a tool but if I went to her telling her about it, she isn't going to listen. Respect what she wants and she'll make the mistakes on her own. When he ****s up, you'll look better in comparison, trust me.