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Thread: Wanting to date a friend

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
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    Wanting to date a friend

    I'm 26. I've known this girl since I was probably 12. She's a year older than I am. She moved away a few towns over a few years ago and we've kind of lost contact but we do chat every now and then and we do see each other as well every once in a while. Her parents are good friends with my parents, despite being separated by some distance now. A while back, we all met for dinner around where she lives. I sat by her and chatted with her about music, a new found love for her. We have the same taste in music, at least now we do. I think that's awesome. I had an epiphany...I wanted to date her. But how? At the time, I was dating someone else...which certainly didn't stop me from thinking about her and you'll soon find out why.

    So I gave her, and my girlfriend at the time, an excuse as to why I had to be back in town (where she lived) in a few days and I asked her if she wanted to meet for dinner. She said yes, but it was really a friends thing. I did pay for her dinner, but it was one of those restaurants where it's like a mix between fast food and an actual restaurant, so it wasn't anything big. Like I say, it was very much just a casual freinds thing. We just caught up and talked about music and she told me about this guy she was "seeing" but stressed that he wasn't her boyfriend. I told her a tiny bit about what was going on with me and my girlfriend and how it probably wasn't going to last much longer. And that was it. I haven't seen her since, only texted her a couple times and talked to her online recently. She knows I'm single now. My relationship with the other girl did eventually end, but it's a good thing.

    Now I'm wondering how I could possibly date my friend. She has one kid who is 5 or 6. She lives alone other than that. My dream would be to maybe move in with her. I can do what I do from anywhere, so it's not like there's anything here holding me back. I live with my parents. But if I lived with her I make enough to help out with rent and stuff like that. She hinted once that she's very spoiled, and I don't really have the money to "spoil" her. My last relationship ended for that reason. She is very busy with work a lot, which is ok. She's home at nights, so it'd be like any normal relationship I suppose.

    I would like a solution other than simply asking her out. Under normal circumstances, I'm a very direct person and I don't like to employ psychological warfare unless necessary. I'm a communicator above all else, but I can't just come out to her. We have a limited romantic history--she was my first kiss a very very long time ago. But we were just kids.

    Any advice? What do you think she is thinking, ladies?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
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    Quote Originally Posted by cofrox1402 View Post
    We have a limited romantic history--she was my first kiss a very very long time ago. But we were just kids.
    Use this. Have a deep conversation with her, and ask her if she remembers it.

    You should be able to feel the rest of it out.

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