Too high standards? Or are men scared of me?

[ecojeanne]

I’m really not sure but I’m starting to question my standards. Lately I have been asked out on dates by a number of guys I’ve hung out with a combination of different friends and I also have refused them coz I don’t fancy them in the slightest for various different reasons (age being a factor-2 of them are 10 years or more older than me, another is just a complete male slut and another 2 are just too insecure). They were all really sweet to me but I just can’t bring myself to accept coz I feel I already know that I would just be giving them the wrong impression and I would have to let them down gently after the date if I accepted.

On the other hand I have a few guys I do quite fancy my age and they (I assume) are not interested coz I was fairly obvious with them to indicate my interest without verbally saying it after they expressed interest in me with certain things they said. One in particular keeps telling me he is going to call me and arrange a date and then never does without me even broaching the subject in the first place. (one online dater I met was just another story partly my fault I think from not being around for while to contact so I don’t really count that). another expressed interest and then said they were too busy to meet for the next month... So it’s very confusing for me. I have to admit I am completely new to this ‘dating’ thing. Am I doing something wrong or should I be accepting dates that I’m not that keen on? The obvious answer to me is no I shouldn’t but how come the guys my age are either sluts or are giving mixed signals? I’m starting to think guys my age are scared of me or somethin’??

Now looks wise i know I’m nothin’ special but I am a very social person, I can generally talk to anyone and have been going out with groups of friends a lot more lately (within the last 2 months) so I have had the opportunities to meet a lot more guys. I’m not some hot thang just an average girl so that’s not why so many have asked me out. It’s simply coz they know I’m free to date.

[Mish]

Now looks wise i know I’m nothin’ special but I am a very social person, I can generally talk to anyone and have been going out with groups of friends a lot more lately (within the last 2 months) so I have had the opportunities to meet a lot more guys.

Welcome to the wonderful world of dating eco. You reject lesser guys because you know you can get better, but the better guys reject you because they know they can get better as well.

You have one huge advantage that may help you though and that advantage is you are a very social person. Your best friend from this point is the numbers. Rack up some numbers of people you know, let it reach hundreds. Once you have a nice pool to select potential partners from things will become a lot easier. On average I found it takes anywhere between 3 - 8 dates to find a partner who is somewhat compatible. So get out there and start number crunching.