Feeling trapped by my own emotions...

[thatgothicchick]

Okay...so...I've known this guy for a few months now...he's everything that I want in a guy...and he's always very very flirty with me, and we just goof around and laugh and have fun and then we have deep, meaningful discussions about life and important things...this would be what I would call the perfect time for me to move in and see if he wants to take our relationship to the next step....

But he has a girlfriend already...I already feel ashamed of myself enough that I have thoughts of not wanting to respect the "he's taken" zone...this girl is nice, and we've spoken briefly a few times, and despite any of that, I don't ever want to hurt ANYBODY or be the cause of someone getting hurt...

She already perceives me as a threat according to him, and he even confronted me (very kindly) about how I feel about him, to which I admitted that I am deeply attracted to him, but that my intentions are noble. And they are. Despite feeling "twitterpated" about him and feeling all these emotions, the last thing I want to do is be the cause of a breakup or someone's pain...but he's hinted at me that their relationship has been going through some rough times...and all relationships do at some point or another, but it's almost as if he's on the fence with her...he does genuinely act like he's interested in me too....

I just got done hanging out with him, and I feel like crap. I feel bummed that I am not with him anymore today, and I feel horrendously guilty for wanting him to myself when he's already somebody's....guilty for even thinking about them possibly breaking up...

I know that SOME aspects of this are out of my control, but for the things that I CAN be in control of, how do I deal with this? What can I do so I don't unintentionally **** somebody's life up, including my own?

[Cerby]

Avoid spending time with him and distance yourself. You can't have him, so being near him isn't going to make it any better.