Was miserable before break up and miserable after...

[Knoxane]

Hello everyone,
So I had been dating this guy for over a year. In the beginning of that year it was great and slowly things started getting worse. He had many insecurities and was possessive sometimes, like if we argued he would call me over and over until there would be 50 or more missed calls and he also had problems with smoking weed. He would do it all the time and I just wouldn't enjoy his company when he did this because he closed up his feelings. Although we did have many many good times together. I love him so muchhh and reaching the end of that year i looked back and realized that I wasnt happy, that we just werent working and we were constantly arguing. Everything seemed like a chore to do even sex because he was constantly unhappy with how often and how much and long it lasted. His family was extremely rude and mean also. I was just exhausted and that is when I decided to break it off to be true to myself and in hopes of moving on. It was really hard for me I love him so much and he meant everything to me and i had to cut him off and ignore his phone calls and texts and well 3 months later here I am and I am so effing miserable. Excuse my language, I was happy for about a month I was making great progress in regaining my happiness and now he is all I think about, I miss him and I just want to see him and be in his life. I try to stay distracted from thinking about him but at the end of the day hes what I want. Im torn though I ended the relationship because I felt like I gave it my all and all my love and even my happiness to make him happy and it just didnt work. Why am I not happy now? Should I go back is there any chance it could work? Do couples ever work after they break up?

[FlaCooln]

You were not happy with him before for many reasons. Going back to him will not fix his problems. You are just lonely, it happens after a breakup. Give it time, let yourself emotionally heal. Then, get back out there and I am sure you will forget all about the ex and meet a great guy.

[Ann S]

In the beginning of a relationship, things usually are great.....that's called the lust phase. Then as we get to know our mate, things get worse, because we haven't done the up front work of getting to know them BEFORE we start a relationship. And you chose someone who sounds controlling and who is controlled by a substance! Weed will numb you out, and also make you stupid - it's not called, "dope," for nothing! When one has a drug between them, there cannot be a close relationship because the drug will always come first.....if it's become an addiction.

So here you have a guy, who is extremely critical, smokin' dope, who comes from a mean, rude, family. What was it you loved about him? I'd say keep running and don't look back. And just WHY would you want to go back to such an unsatisfactory, awful, unhappy, relationship? I can't imagine other than you haven't found a new guy, yet. Good Luck. Ann

[brazilianuts]

I really feel ur pain, as Im going through it right now....Finding it really hard to cope without him....And its only been a day! =/