Hey All,
We had a great thing. He was crazy about me. Had a lot of respect for me. I broke it off because I saw some warning signs I didn't like; I hurt him badly.
He was so hurt that he went around telling everyone the most private, harmful, intimate details I had trusted him with - things from my past that made people now hate me (I'm sober and totally different now.) I realize he did this psychological revenge thing to decrease his pain, and his ego was bruised. But he really destroyed my reputation. It was all he could think of to do to punish me.
To complicate things further, after I realized what he was doing out there, I became worried about my reputation and just wanted him to stop it, so I called and texted him on a few days for the next 2 weeks, telling him how upset and angry I was. I'm mad at myself because I let him know he had intimidated me. I even apologized for hurting him. He then had a family member threaten me to stop contacting him. So he set it all up that I can't even tell him how pissed I am as I continue to hear more and more things he's said about me. He put me right where he wanted me. He's refusing to speak to me, knowing it will make me implode.
Some time has gone by now, we've had no contact for 6 weeks.
Would a grown man ever feel bad for doing this? Does he know deep inside how wrong it was, even though he's got people around him who are validating his bad behavior and giving me a hard time? Will this behavior of his really work in the longrun to make him feel better? Does he consider this a "win" on his part?
And can I ever regain my respect back from him for acting so weak right after the break-up now that I haven't contacted him? My pride is hurting too and it's making me angry. He thinks he's cool for doing this to me because I've got a powerful father and he's getting away with it.