I lost my virginity

[Callalily]

I don't know why I'm writing this right now, but if I can't talk to anyone I am going to lose my mind. I'm to embarassed to talk to someone I know. I got drunk saturday and slept with an old friend....I don't know what happened, I don't even remember much...I cannot believe what happened, I was not this knid of girl...I'm just so dissapointed and ashamed, I didn't want it to happen like this. I just feel used..what can I do now, I haven't even talked to the guy since it appened...I don't this we ever will

[steviej]

Was protection used? If not you need the emergency contraceptive, you have (i think) 72hrs to use it, but the quicker you get it the better.

[Callalily]

I don't remember...that's why I'm so embarassed, I would have never done it if I hadn't been drunk. I'm not trying to find an excuse, I just have no idea what happened.

[steviej]

Then you need to get the 'morning after' pill. Don't put your head in the sand about this, as getting pregnant will make this far worse!

Get that sorted, then think about speaking to your friend about what happened. Personally i'd want it to get it straight with them rather than feel awkward like it is now.

[smackie9]

Sorry you feel that way, but don't. You will go through life making mistakes, they are life's lessons, and well despite the circumstances it's quite normal, and you will get something positive from this. First times are mostly not perfect or even great, some disastrous, so you didn't really lose out. Secondly, it's just sex, it's not something that is to be put up on a pedestal. Lastly, yes most of us had one or a few nights where our better judgment was altered by consuming too much alcohol, so stop knocking yourself around about it. Like the OP has mentioned, to clear your conscience about it, just have a quick conversation about it to your friend. There's a possibility this friend really likes you, so you might have to let him down softly.

[Devilsbane]

It happens. You need to accept that and move on. A single time doesn't make you that kind of girl, and if you aren't on the pill you should definitely consider the morning after pill.

We make some mistakes so that we can learn from them.

[Callalily]

Thank you for your advice. I guess I kinda panicked. I mean it's not like I was saving myself for marriage or anything it's just that...I didn't want it to happen like this...I just felt embarassed and dissapointed with myself. I took the pill, hope everything will be alright.Thank you again for making me feel better

[romantic_guy]

Don't beat yourself up about this. We all make mistakes. I got my girlfriend pregnant when she was 16 and I wasn't even drinking! (fortunately, we are still together 39 years later.) Learn from it. A word of caution: The more alcohol we consume the more our decision making part of the brain is effected. That is why people drive drunk; they think they are OK. So have a friend that will not let you leave the bar with some guy. At that point you really don't know what you are doing.

[Callalily]

I think I'll stay out of bars for a while...I'm not beating myself up about it, it's just that I don't drink alcohol or go out on bars or clubs.I just had a horrible month, I had some problems at home and...I know that's not an excuse, no one forced me ...I guess drinking is not the best way to handle problems

[bloodtippedrose]

Drinking is no way of handling problems at all, it sort of numbs the problem.

Glad you're not trying to find an excuse. It does suck that your first time, which you'll never forget, was a drunken accident. But theres nothing you can do about it now except pick yourself up and move on. Things will be awkward with your friend at first but its no reason to lose him or never talk to him again. If I were you I'd talk to him still and probably be lighthearted and sort of hide it, and after you guys have gotten comfortable with each other again it can be brought up casually.

From now on be more aware of the situation you are putting yourself in. Be conscious of who you're around and how much alcohol you're consuming. Its a learning experience!

[dutng]

dont think about this. you will going travel to vietnam.

[Callalily]

bloodtippedrose you're right, it was a learning experience...
dutng what about vietnam?

[amy86]

my first time was similar to yours-most peoples first time is like that...you need to be on birth control...give it a few weeks and you'll feel fine hun...and if you haven't heard from your so called friend, don't give him a second thought x

[Callalily]

he called today...I guess I would have wanted him to react differently, but it's not like I was expecting to be together or anything....I guess I'll be over it in a few days...

[vashti]

I don't mean to scare you, but if the boy was not a virgin, I suggest you also get yourself tested for STIs. The statistics say that 1 in 4 sexually active young people are packing some sort of infection.

How old are you?