HI :C
My boyfriend and I are both turning 21 this year, we're going to different colleges, he's an hour away from his hometown (where I am) and he plays a sport called handball. We've known each other since we were 6 (Always went to school together).
Well, I started dating this guy in late July. I was at first kinda wary, because even if he and I talked in high school (We had one class together and last summer he confessed he had liked me then), I had a REALLY BAD PAST at gradeschool (The class outcast in a class of 50, same kids for 8 years), so I just didn't wanna associate with him. But I took him up on his offer and so far it's been okay.
My only issue is... I kind of feel used. Sort of like I'm the one thing he goes to when he has nothing to fill into his schedule. School and handball, as one can imagine, take up a lot of his time. In fact, when we started dating he had explained to me that the reason why he hadn't really had too many girlfriends (Just one before me) was because he was "basically married to handball". I told him I'd try to understand and be supportive, and I think I've done pretty well so far.
I haven't said anything to him all these months, because I've always gotten the vibe that he's just a busy guy, with college and all, and he's VERY passionate about handball so I figure I'll be supportive. But he'll often invite me up (Which is an hour drive, at least a gallon of gas each time, and a gallon back) very late at night, like at ten. Then he'll attempt to have sex with me (Pending my mood), then go to bed (And hold me, and cuddle me for a while) then often enough I'll have to leave in the morning because "he has practice/school/a tournament/something".
I mean, being with him is nice. I know I'm lucky enough to even be able to see my boyfriend while others are states or even countries away, but, don't I deserve more than that? Yesterday evening, a day after he'd invited me up (And I went, and left, like he asked), I confronted him about it. I told him I think we've been dating long enough that I deserve a little bit more than that every time I come up, because if he misses me like he says then we should probably be doing something other than having sex and cuddling when I visit. Now, that's not to say that on break he isn't a sweetheart. He's just... A damn busy guy, always scheduling stuff with handball or friends or working out or.... Something. He responded saying he knows, and it upsets him too, but school and handball are just things he has to do.
And I understand that, of course. It's school and something he loves. But I feel like I deserve a little bit more than what I get. I'm not really complaining about his breaks because at least we get some time to ourselves then, but they're so few and far between that it's hard to focus on them. With the way he's "scheduling me in", I feel less like his girlfriend and more like his call girl.
Help? I mean, I feel like I barely know the guy. He won't even talk to me about handball, while he'll talk about it with his friends and family, but to me he says "It's just hard to talk about it with someone who's not interested in sports, no offense". I guess I just want to be more of a part of his life, but I don't know what to do!
INB4: Offer to play handball with him. I have. He said he'd teach me, but he has yet to lift a finger to do so... :\\