could someone give me their opinion? thank you

[deltagrl]

HI! I recently broke off a two month dating relationship,with a guy who was going through a divorce.[wife cheated on him, kicked him out,he moved out with his son,and she filed for divorce].
I met him in Nov.meanwhile ..She left the state,moved in with new guy and left their beautiful home. He was devastated...Friends told him to get out there and start dating..I guess. to take his mind off it.

Anyway,we hit it off...and he wanted to spend more time together than I did [guess he was lonely] . He was crazy about me,..but I wanted to take it slow. So We dated every Sat nite..That became the norm.

I knew his divorce finalization was to go through early Jan, lest I would have cut if off completely. He kept saying their relationship was over, done..no going back.H e said she despised him...I could tell his self esteem was damaged...he kept saying he didnt deserve me..
He was always a gentleman with me, polite and kind. We even went to church together with his son. It bothered me though that he talked about it given the chance. I told him I didnt want to discuss this,..that we were dating,..and I felt he still cared for her deeply. He promised it would never happen again and it did not.

The date of the final divorce came, and I didnt hear from him. I thought he would call me,..and tell me.. He didnt. I checked into seeing if the divorce did go through,and saw it had not. The kicker was there was a domestic violence injunction attached.This freaked me out completely ......and scarred me too. I tried to keep my cool,called him as he was at work out of town, and gave him the chance to explain. I knew he was a passive type guy, and the ex apparently wore the pants in the marriage.

Although we had seen each other for 2 mos.,the idea of this still scared the hell out of me.[domestic violence?]. what the hell? When speaking to him,I told him how scared I was...and didnt understand why she would do such a thing!.He didnt want to tell me I guess out of embarressent..I knew he wasnt that type person, plus she wasnt even here for her to claim he was abusive. Long story a little shorter,
He said he was scared too...but she was doing this because she was mad he was contesting the original financial agreement, [on the date the divorce was to be finalized]......which he had signed earlier under duress finding out about the cheating...He said it was all so fast..
I wanted him to reassure me something,..but he kept saying,.."how do you think i feel?'..

and said it wasnt right for her to get his pension, etc...after she did the damage. I did understand that,but thought it could drag out forever..
We ended up in an argument, and I broke things off..saying this could go on and on...to which I wasnt up for..[ last relationship I was in ended badly,..and took me 5 years to start dating again after that]

a week later I wondered if I did the wrong thing, because I later saw where she dropped the DV injunction,as an exchange for him to go forward with the process asap. So the finalization did happen the first of Feb.

I later emailed him and explained I hoped he didnt resent me,but I did at the time what I thought was best.
I told him I missed him, and cared about him very much..which he replied back he did me too. I kept in touch with him, letting him know I cared still,..and let him know I was taking a vacation to clear my head. He emailed back saying he hoped to see me when I returned, wished me a safe trip..etc.
Meanwhile he moves back into their big home, with the son. since things were finalized. Upon my return, I texted him saying I was back in town and would like to get together for a drink.
My feelings were hurt when He responded with telling me he had moved back into the house,felt traumatized and was backing off from the dating scene .

I pretended it did not hurt me, and said I understood, and was there if he needed to talk. he replied back saying thank you very much, will be in touch.. That was almost two weeks ago..and not one word from him.
Do you guys think he has written me off, or reeling from the divorce process.? ..I feel confused... Thanks for your input..I appreciate it..

[MerryH]

Do you guys think he has written me off, or reeling from the divorce process.?

Why can't it be both? I think it's both.

Edit: I mean, yeah, he's written you off, but probably not because of anything you did. Bad timing.