Your thoughts on relationships that began online?

[NotApplicable]

Hi everybody, new poster here.

I wanted to get a bit of an idea on peoples thoughts about something. I've been on eHarmony for about 4 months (I'm 27/f) and after meeting 8 or 9 no-goes (almost all of them didn't make it to a second date, and that was mostly me saying no), the latest guy is wonderful. We didn't talk online at all before meeting - literally just an email from him saying he was going away for a week in a day or two, then I sent an email saying we should meet before he goes because I hate all the emailing, and we met the next day. I like him a LOT (we've met three times, it's been a blast every time) and clearly he likes me a lot too. I'm starting to think that this might actually be a thing.

But now I'm questioning the legitimacy of a relationship that begins online, in general. Is it really possible for it to be as 'real' as something where you met for the first time in real life? Is it possible for the same kind of "love" to grow? Or is it just a stop gap until something better comes along? I suppose now that I'm actually faced with the idea that maybe I'm entering in to a relationship that began online, I'm wondering about its legitimacy. I was hesitant to join eHarmony at all - I'm still young and with an active social life and am very independent, but I just wanted to feel like I was being 'proactive' because I do want someone to share the fun times with! I guess I'm wondering like, will the strength of the relationship be weaker because of how it began? What are your thoughts about this?

I haven't had any discussions about this at all with him of course. We just have a good time together and I'm trying not to overthink it - but clearly I am! Haha.

[TablesandChairs]

As women, we tend to grow up with the 'Cinderalla' complex - Prince Charming rocks up and it's a whirlwind of love and amazement - the skies light up, the streets glisten...music starts playing out of nowhere and you laugh the night away, certain that this wonderful stranger will be your future husband.

Cue real world: the only people who rock up to my door unannounced are Jehova's Witnesses and my parents. And even if some random attractive dude on a while stallion did show up, I'd probably call the cops and lock the doors.

I met my ex in the 'real' world and there was nothing particularly glamorous about it - we met through a friend during a boring birthday party. I had the beginnings of a cold so we exchanged numbers and I rushed home, in a flood of snot. I met my now fiancee online and that was actually far more romantic/memorable (not the online bit, but our actual date).

Don't over-think things - its the relationship that forms and develops that matters, not some concept that you had about falling in love under fireworks in the middle of a snowy field where the squirrels sing harmoniously. It's great you met someone you click with and where there's mutual liking involved - that's hard enough without worrying about the surface details.

[NotApplicable]

Thanks bud. Needed to hear that. You're totally 100% correct.

[TheEvilJester]

In all honesty, how is meeting somebody online all that different from meeting somebody in person? As long as you are careful about it and don't just go around meeting anybody, it really is not all that different from if you met a relative stranger in person and decided to go out.

Heck, it's better even, because you get to know a little bit about them via their profile, and also through e-mailing with them. True, it could all be made up, but how is that any different from dating somebody you met in real life? They can lie just the same. So, in my view there really is nothing wrong at all with the concept of online dating. It's just one other way to meet people. You are under no obligation to keep seeing people if you don't hit it off, just like you wouldn't be if you met them in real life.