FB's for 6 years...?

[Malboro Belle]

Hi guys, I'll try to be short and sweet

My FB (f*** buddy, for want of a better term) have been having trysts for 6 years now, ever since I was 18 (he was 19) so we have a pretty big history. This will occur a few times a year, inbetween relationships, breakups and generally moving on up in the world. Never had any issues - the sex has always been phenomonal for both of us. Best I've ever had, but I think that this is because of the emotional connection rather than the physical action.

When we're er...'done', he's overtly gentle and tender. Kisses on my forehead, gentle tickles on my tummy, slow caresses, and spooning all night long through to the morning when I get ready to leave. By spooning, I mean an almost vice-like grip which doesn't let me move to the other side of the bed. I should also mention that this is the most masculine man I've ever met, and certainly wouldn't stike anyone as the sort to want to cuddle after the fact.

Is this the usual post-casual sex behaviour? I'm not complaining, but this sort of leads me to believe that there may be something else lurking beneath the layers of lust that consumes us when we're within a 6ft radius of one another.

I'm thinking that if we're still the best both of us has had, maybe in another 6 years I should ask him out to dinner?

Or quite possibly, all men react this way after having a HUGE session, and I should just leave the well alone?

If you need further details, let me know!

[Primo]

Most definitely it's just a f*** for him, the cuddling etc is just a part of his personality - after sex routine. I would make other plans for your life, because if you cut the p***y off he won't have anything to do with you.

For what it's worth, guys that are good in bed can have phenomenal sex with anyone, so from a male's point of view you're just something different. Different smell, touch, taste and personality to connect with, nothing more. If there was anything at all other than that you would know in spades by now.

Sorry if that seems a little harsh and maybe not what you want to hear, but I've been there when I was younger and no matter how intimate we were when we together, she was just a different piece of a** that I knew was good and did what I liked, but I still had mind blowing sex with my s/o's too.

[Malboro Belle]

Most definitely it's just a f*** for him, the cuddling etc is just a part of his personality - after sex routine. I would make other plans for your life, because if you cut the p***y off he won't have anything to do with you.

For what it's worth, guys that are good in bed can have phenomenal sex with anyone, so from a male's point of view you're just something different. Different smell, touch, taste and personality to connect with, nothing more. If there was anything at all other than that you would know in spades by now.

Sorry if that seems a little harsh and maybe not what you want to hear, but I've been there when I was younger and no matter how intimate we were when we together, she was just a different piece of a** that I knew was good and did what I liked, but I still had mind blowing sex with my s/o's too.

Haha, not harsh at all. Thanks for the response, as I said - I'm happy with the current arrangement. Just a few things he's said/done that spiked my curiosity is all.

[Primo]

Ya, if it works for you, great ! But just don't let your mind play tricks on you, it definitely is what it is.

[misombra]

mmmmmmmmmm feelings are starting to catch for you!

i hope it's true that you really are happy.

[Gigabitch]

You're not supposed to have an emotional connection with a FB. That's how you get shredded.

[Primo]

Malboro Belle, misombra and GB make good points. (Sorry GB, can't type bitch yet, it feels mean) :-P

There's some red flags in what you posted, I think we all noticed them. True FWB's are rare, usually on one side there's some feelings involved that are being hidden. To give you an idea, imo, of what a true FWB is, my friend and I worked together. If a new girl came into the office or she was working on a project with someone that saw me and had asked about me, she was always my personal recruiting/pr person.

She would touch on intimate details about me and the next thing I knew someone would be calling or coming into my office to say hi and strike up a conversation. If there was chemistry, I'd have a new friend :-) I was always on the lookout for guys I thought she might like too. It was always that way with us. In between when we wanted physical companionship we had the most raw, intense sex you could ever imagine.

I don't mean to get too personal about my own life back then on your thread, but imo that's a f*** buddy.

[davidtorres]

If he wants more then he would ask for it. But for 6 years of being FB? im pretty sure thats all he wants from you.

like what they always said, "WHY BUY THE COW IF YOU CAN GET THE MILK FOR FREE?"

[Cbrider]

(Sorry GB, can't type bitch yet, it feels mean) :-P

Lol, you're a softie.

This is the number one reason why a **** buddy has never appealed to me. One night stands are something I don't care much for anymore either.

When sex is involved emotions come into play and become a huge factor whether you want them to or not. Just find a boyfriend, someone you really like beyond the sex. You're obviously okay with the possibility of a relationship seeing how you are gravitating towards this guy as more than a FB whether you admit it or not.

[Malboro Belle]

Thanks everyone. It's not that my emotions are getting out of control, and I really have no aspirations to get into a relationship with this guy, however I was wondering what your perspective was on the lovey-dovey stuff.

This is the one and only FB I've had, and will probably ever have as I'm not one to 'test the waters' so to speak. I'd be happy to have him as an occasional for year to come.

We've figured out what works for us, and continue to maintain it to that degree. We often joke that if we're still doing this when we're 50, then we may as well pack up and get hitched I suppose that's an indication of just how comfy we are.

[Malboro Belle]

If he wants more then he would ask for it. But for 6 years of being FB? im pretty sure thats all he wants from you.

like what they always said, "WHY BUY THE COW IF YOU CAN GET THE MILK FOR FREE?"

LOL. I'd never heard that saying before looking at this forum, as well as it's 'sausage' counterpart.

It's cool, because I only want the exact same thing from him. But he's not normally that clingly.

[Primo]

Exactly, enjoy it for what it is. You're both still young, eventually one of you or both will meet someone that you have incredible sex with too, fall in love with them which will make the sex even better and then the fb and fb thing will quickly become a distant memory, that much I can assure you.