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Thread: "loose" situation

  1. #1
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    "loose" situation

    hi!
    I have a problem and I hope to get some suggestions, personal experiences etc

    I have been datin this guy for a month now...anyways, things are good but...
    BUT...
    he has...he can't get it up (please, no laugh).
    we have tried few times, and no result.
    my question: now what?
    I am asking for an advice from this emotional side, not sexual (however, if u have any of those, they r welcome too).
    he is a good man, nice, gentle etc...but this is starting to seriously bug me...I fell it would be stupid to leave him just for that...on the other hand, what am I supposed to do? how long should I wait? or shouldn't I wait anymore?
    besides, I'm not even sure I want to leave him at all...except for that part, thing r good, I like it.
    I have hit a wall, help pls

    p.s. english is my second language so have mercy with my grammar

  2. #2
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    I can totally relate. Age 24 I fall for this gentle lovely guy. Only problem he can't get it up.
    Young and in love I decide that it doesn't matter.

    We worked on it over the years and got a sufficient level I would say (by that time I still had not developped sexual confidence so I thought that's it that's how good it can be).

    We were in love for 2 years but after that we started growing apart. You see we had not much in common. We wer faithful, weel educated, came from the same area, same education... but thats' about it...while I was becoming a woman with more needs he setlled to a sort of Peter Pan state....

    I got out of the relationship a bit damaged with the feeling that I gave more than I received.
    Anyway my next partner after him was sooo the opposite. A real man with the right attitude toward sex. We shared great chemistry!!!!
    Now I know that sex is important in a relationship. It is the cement that keeps the relationship outside of the friend zone.
    It's pleasurable. It's fun.
    And if your partner can't give it to you, unless he is being proactive about resolving the issues (counselling etc) give it a few months but if things do not improve go and sail other waters!!!

  3. #3
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    This is a perfectly valid reason to stop dating a male that you have basically no time investment with.

    Whether or not you stop seeing him, you should urge him to see a physician. He may have a serious underlying medical condition, and even if he doesn't, the doctor can help him with his problem.
    Relax... I'll need some information first. Just the basic facts - can you show me where it hurts?

  4. #4
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    Has he brought up the issue at all? Its not an easy issue to bring up but it needs to be addressed. Something similar happened to me but he talked about it a little bit (when it happened) and I understood where he was coming from. Maybe if you understand the situation then you can decide what path you want to take from there.
    So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
    blue skies from pain.
    Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
    A smile from a veil?
    Do you think you can tell?
    And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
    Hot ashes for trees?
    Hot air for a cool breeze?
    Cold comfort for change?
    And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

  5. #5
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    yeh he could be suffering from depression or anxiety or something. or something physical. sex is a big part of a relationship but the personality shouldnt be thrown aside either.

  6. #6
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    Can he get it up to masturbate? Does he just have trouble maintaining an erection with you or is it always limp?

    Regardless, he should go see his doctor to be on the safe side. Most of the time, it's simply a matter of too much going on in a guys mind when he's trying to impress a new woman.
    Keep your love life off Facebook, don't cheat, it's never too soon to make a move on a woman you like.

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