being used by someone who no longer "wants commitment"

[destinie09]

My ex and I just split up about a week ago. We live together and will be until our lease is up September 1st. Since we broke up, I've been more miserable than ever before. Also, since we broke up, he's basically acting like nothing is wrong, like we're still in a relationship, just not. He still wants to be intimate, still kisses me before he goes anywhere, even still says I love you. Alot has happened just since we broke up... I came home from my moms the day after we split to find an empty condom wrapper in our bedroom, he lied to my face saying it was just garbage, he hadn't slept with anyone. Then last night, we had plans to go out together. I fell asleep, when I woke up he was mapquesting directions. When I asked him where he was goin he said he was going to a "buddy's" place to play xbox... that was fine. I was disappointed but realized we aren't together, i can't expect him to wanna do things with me stil anyway. But then, he showers, shaves, gels his hair etc.. all things he rarely ever does, except special occasions. As he was walking out the door, he gives me a kiss and says he loves me. He came back last night around 1am and acted like nothing was wrong. I know this sounds bad, but I KNOW he didn't go hangout with friends, he NEVER gets cleaned up to go play xbox...

I think I know what I need to do, but I'm not sure if I can...

Right now I feel like a worthless object he's keeping around for his own convenience. I just need someone to talk to I guess, but any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[sookie6]

your guy seems to be so completely hormone driven for now.

His erratic behaviour screams 'I want to test other waters' but dont' want to leave the safe environement you're providing just yet.

Honey, you know what you need to do. Don't waste your time on him and staying in this in'between arragement is so unhealthy you might end up with a nervous break-down.

If you can move out, make it a priority. Whe he is not around so that he does not pull any emotional bullshit on you.

Be the grown up.

[xxazurexx]

I reckon he has another woman. He's going overboard with his appearance and for a reason and he's making an effort for someone/to impress someone.

LOL@ the condom excuse. Was it a habit of his and to buy condoms, open them and just to look at them and disgard them?

I smell BULLSHIT.

[Endlessagony]

your guy seems to be so completely hormone driven for now.

His erratic behaviour screams 'I want to test other waters' but dont' want to leave the safe environement you're providing just yet.

That's the truth right there I'm afraid, better to get away before it gets worse.

[LailaK]

UGH. Don't let yourself be used. He's not worth it.

Ignore his ass when he acts crazy. Tell him he's not allowed to kiss you, he has lost the right. Don't you dare cook for him, clean for him or any of that crap. Until the end of your lease act like he doesn't exist.

Go out with your girlfriends and find random guys to flirt with.

Trust me, this will make you feel better about yourself. Take care of yourself and don't prostrate yourself for some man who doesn't even give a f*ck about you.

[Teddy057]

I think you should move out of your apartment when he's out for the day or something. You two are broken up, why the hell are you still living together? Move in with your mom if you have to. Think of how he'll react when he comes home to find all your shit gone, including you. He will come crawling back, with eyes full of tears. What will you do? You will not give a shit, because this behavior he's just demonstrated is nothing you want in a relationship.

[lotus petals]

or better yet tell him to get the heck out! he wanted the break so technically he should be the one to go but obviously he's not living in reality by expecting to have his cake and eat it too. he knows you are a push over and will take advantage of you until sept if you let him. grow a set and make his life miserable so he can't move out quick enough!

[IncognitoSir]

I cant believe you're still giving it up to him. Dont allow yourself to be used like this. Don't except his "i love yous" thats like an emotional slap in the face everytime he says it to you. He doesnt love you and he you know he doesnt. He might have at some point but not now. If you keep this up with him, it's really going to hurt you in the long run when it come to relationships with other people.

[girl68]

Next time he tries to kiss you stop him. Take the reins back right now he's driving your feelings and emotions- don't let him.

[Gigabitch]

Close your legs, for God's sake. I infer that you're still sleeping with him. Is that correct? If so, you're half of the problem. Of course he's acting like nothing's changed. It's convenient for him. My question is, why are you allowing this?