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Thread: Tips - how to do things right this time -

  1. #1
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    Tips - how to do things right this time -

    Hi,

    I have posted different experiences in this site over the years. I have gone through some crazy difficult stories and I am learning. Right now I am using online dating to meet quality professional men. After meeting several people, I finally found one that I am attracted to. We are in a very early stage right now as we have only met once. The time we spent was good, we talked for two hours in a public place and I could tell he was interested. I know there was chemistry. Now, in my past I have always rushed so much, especially when I like the guy. This time I am taking my time and take it everything slow. At the end of our first time meeting, he told me "well, if you are interested in hang out, give me a call, we can get together again and we will see from there". Part of me felt awkward because usually men are the ones saying "I will call you" even if they do not mean it...but I didn't want to read too much into, as I have learned men are not that complicated, especially after meeting for the first time, he really doesn't know, I really doesn't know him...so I waited one day and on the second day after, I just sent him a text saying "Just want to say hi, how are you doing?" and he replied within minutes...so I realized he did want me to take the initiative to look for him. He is a police officer and he has a very busy and different schedule than me. In his messages he told me that he was glad I contacted him again, that he really liked meeting me and that he found me very attractive...so that is a good thing. We were texting all night but then he mentioned twice that I should stop by his work and say hi during his night shift...so he even said tonight...but I do not know, I really like this guy and I do not want to make the same mistakes like rushing things...I would like to have a cute normal date with him again...so anyway, we made plans to see each other for a little bit on Monday before his shift starts. My questions for the men in this forum (you always provide great perspectives) - Any advise in how to make sure that since the beginning I can keep him interested in me and that he gets the message that I will not get physical right away? He sent me some messages that made me wonder but I do not want to over think...but he would say come and visit me at work, then I kind of joke and I said...maybe one day, it will be nice to see you in uniform, then he replied saying...oh you want to jump my bones...so I smiled and said, easy, we just met, I am a lady....so he said he was joking but that he wouldn't mind with me...so I think it is too early for that type of comment but we will see. I was very cleared when I met him that I do not want a one night stand... advise in what not to do or say will be appreciated, I am so bad at this...need your opinions and suggestions...

  2. #2
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    I think you are doing great ! Take your time.

  3. #3
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    Depending on how he meant it, I did not like how forward he was with you sexually. If he was really interested in you as a person, sex would not be the first thing on his mind. Meaning, if he saw in you more than just physical attraction, he would be focused on you as a person and not sex. If he had feelings for you, then it's normal for him to want to be closer to you physically, but in this case it looks concerning. Keep this in mind, it might explain things that will happen later on. Also keep in mind whatever he does with you, that's most likely how he acts with other women. If he is so fast to get sexual, then that's probably how he is with other women he just met.
    Last edited by toknow; 05-05-13 at 05:01 PM.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by toknow View Post
    Depending on how he meant it, I did not like how forward he was with you sexually. If he was really interested in you as a person, sex would not be the first thing on his mind. Meaning, if he saw in you more than just physical attraction, he would be focused on you as a person and not sex. If he had feelings for you, then it's normal for him to want to be closer to you physically, but in this case it looks concerning. Keep this in mind, it might explain things that will happen later on. Also keep in mind whatever he does with you, that's most likely how he acts with other women. If he is so fast to get sexual, then that's probably how he is with other women he just met.
    Yes - I agree. I am hoping he was kidding, but we will see. The area that is assigned to him is in the University area that I study at and he mentioned that we could meet there and walk on campus before he goes to work or during his work time. I joked back saying "oh so that means I will have my personal police officer walking me to my car?". he said "if you are lucky lol" so I do not know what to think about that. It gave me the "all girls want me" type of idea...usually a man will say yes, of course..you know? so I am not putting more energy on this one. I think it is his turn to look for me and to make sure we meet tomorrow if he is interested, if not - NEXT!

  5. #5
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    He's just sarcastic and being witty. Play along a bit and have fun with it, he wants to see ur personalty. My GF and I met online a few weeks ago and we are both like that and love to joke around.
    Last edited by FlaCooln; 06-05-13 at 02:57 AM.

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    Good to know -

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