Long Distance Advice - Please

[theguy]

I am currently involved in a long distance relationship, that goes for another year. We recently set up webcams, and I absolutley hate having conversations over them. I smile through my teeth hating it, but she seems to enjoy it. The conversations go on to long and Im afraid that If i dont adjust and find a way to enjoy these conversations, since we have nearly a year left that I am going to ruin what we have. Anyways, does anyone have any tips even those that dont deal with webcams about how to help a long distance relationship last? Or success stories? Please anyone I don't want distance to be the deciding factor between failure and success

[Gigabitch]

I advise you to go for quality, not quantity with LDR contact. Find some way of reaching out every single day, be it webcam, phone call, email or even a quick text, but don't let it get to the point where those awkward silences start to creep in.

My LDR was successful because we got to see each othe at least once a month and we had a solid exit strategy. It sounds like you know for sure it's only a year, so that helps, but are you going to see her before then?

[Junket]

I saw my girlfriend every other month.

We only spoke on the phone once a week, and sometimes throughout the week with instant messaging.

We new from the start it wouldn't be sustainable, long distance and long term should never be in the same sentence if there are other options.

Can you visit her?

Have you even ever met her? (Don't laugh some people haven't.)

My girlfriend and I moved twice. The first time it went from a 3 hour plane ride, to 3 hour weekend drives to visit each other.

After we got tired of that nonsense we moved together to the same city, and have be dating a total of 2+ years now. Known each other for 3+ years now.

The key is to be proactive.

Those conversations will grow unbearable quick if you don't do something.

[theguy]

her and I always act so positive about the outlook of our relationship we never talk about it ending or the fact that both of us our really worried about it, were not used to being apart and when she left she left in the very early stages of our relationship we havent been together that long at all, in fact she will be gone longer than we have been together. Do we just need to talk about this, and be real about it that is hard and were going to lose a little feelings for one another or something, please someone let me know from a girls perspective

[Sonrisa]

her and I always act so positive about the outlook of our relationship we never talk about it ending or the fact that both of us our really worried about it, were not used to being apart and when she left she left in the very early stages of our relationship we havent been together that long at all, in fact she will be gone longer than we have been together. Do we just need to talk about this, and be real about it that is hard and were going to lose a little feelings for one another or something, please someone let me know from a girls perspective

girls have easier times with LDRs then boys. boys are having difficulties staying loyal to their partners. girls are more attached to having contact, thus webcams bring them some sort of closure. you probably have less to worry about then she does.

[Tiay]

ah, a topic after my own heart.

can I ask why you don't like the webcam chats? I mean is the connection slow or the image quality bad or something? Can you see the output from your own webcam so you can see what she's seeing? I always found that oddly reassuring, myself. If you're just grinning and bearing it eventually you will come to resent it..

Sounds like you've got issues. Issues are, imo, always better when you address them. It seems like both of you are committed to making this work, so you've got a good chance of talking through it.

I had a 3 1/2 year LDR, and yes, I'd compare the gaps between visits to the gaps between electricity pylons, with the line slacking in between. At the lowest point of the gap, it's true that you think of them less and although you know you love them, you can't feel it as strongly as usual. But, on the bright side, when you see them at the airport you'll practically be floating.
You've only got one year to wait, which to me personally does not seem that long. Heck one of my between-visit gaps was almost a year long. *brag*..
Visit each other as often as possible and talk about everything, is my advice. Heck you have all this time to do nothing but talk, think of it as an opportunity to get to know her better mentally.
good luck ^.^