Feeling pressured to have sex

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

Not sure where to start but I guess I'll just let my fingers go with the flow...

As we all know I already had the baby 3 weeks ago. My stitches are now out, and I believe my period is finally over but I'm not sure because it pops right back up on me out of the blue.

My boyfriend is always grinding on me. I like it, but then he gets hard and I don't want to be the blame for any blue balls because I am not ready for sex.

The fear of becoming pregnant again is extremely high for me because I know in the first 3 months after having one it is really easy to get pregnant again(or so I've been told).

I already have 2 kids, and that's already alot, I can't imagine having 3 with 2 in pampers only months apart. I hate to see that shit much less to become one of those parents.

I haven't had my six week check up so I don't feel comfortable having sex even with a condom until my doctor says it's fine.

My "friends" are always pressuring me to have sex. Saying it's unfair to the bf and what not. Then they say to at least give him head, which he doesn't even want.

Today they brought up the topic about head and my bf says it doesn't feel right to him. So one of them made a joke and said maybe they should take him to a hoe house and get it from someone else.

Now I can take a joke, but I think it went way too far. My boyfriend already can't take pressure cuz his stupid ass will give in. Ever since that stripper thing, I realized he would give in once put under enough pressure, which isn't even alot.

It infuriates me just thinking about it. I can't trust him around his boys because all they gotta do is call him a punk and he will give in. Of course he wouldn't admit that, but I know it for myself seeing as that stripper incident happened in front of me.

I feel like calling it quits/taking a break from this relationship with him until he gets his nut out. I'm not ready for sex mentally and physically and I don't feel the need for worrying about if he has given in and ****ed someone else because I am not ****ing him.

I try to look at things as letting petty things go. I also try not to make decisions based on just my feelings because I refuse to live in a broken home just because of infidelity and then end up raising two kids by myself when I can just keep my family together without being intimate with him since he wants to look elsewhere. But I don't know for sure if it is worth the stay.

Eh, I feel weird and stuck at this point and I'm starting to contradict my views on how a relationship works. Any ideas on how to handle the pressure? Am I overreacting? It's really bothering me.

[Illusional]

wait, correct me if i'm wrong, but you didn't like giving bj's yeah?

raverboy

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

No I love giving them. It's my boyfriend who doesnt want them.

[Illusional]

tell him to suck it up because for the time being, that is all that he is going to get.

raverboy

[lastwish]

Men like this infuriates me too. Can't he give a little patience? If he doesn't think the wait is worth it, he isn't worth it either. Why isn't he okay with just bj right now?

[qwertz]

wow, i cant believe he's so in sensitive. I dont know what to say, but if he is willing to cheat just because you cant have sex for a little while then...jeez, i would say your better off without him, but after just having a baby, i guess thats the last thing you want to hear.

[Wiredbomb0]

Wow, a guy that doesn't like head, never heard that before!

Sounds like your 'freinds' are real jerks, if they are forcing you to do something that you don't want to do. It's up to you what you do, and not them, so don't give in to what they want.

He needs to respect you and give you some time.

So he's just going to have to learn to wait!~

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

The only thing he does that annoys me is get all worked up for no reason. The pressure mainly comes from our so called friends that are always telling me to go **** him and stop holding off since I dont have stitches anymore.

I never fully understood why he doesnt care for head, it's weird to me too. If I even attempt to do it he would say no and move away. It's always been that way from time I met him.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

My main concern about him is that he doesn't handle being under pressure in a good way. He cracks and gives in. So I feel like if he were out his boys and they brought him to a hoe house and they told him to go **** one, with enough pressure he would give in, and I really hate that about him. I wish I could change that about him but I can't.

[ecojeanne]

omg how the hell are his friends not in the slightest embarrassed by this. they have no shame. i've never heard of such behavior from adults. are they teenagers or something? that's insane. tell them to politely fck themselves, it's none of their fcking business. how dare they! god i want to cut them down to size myself i'm sooo disgusted. ladie you do not have to put up with that shit from people who are so not IN the flippin relationship in the first place. omg i'm actually so angry right now!

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

I just left the house and went home. I felt totally disrespected and don't know if I really want to hang out around them anymore.

[lhn]

Your bloke needs to stand up and tell them to shut the fck up. Completely out of line. Boys will be boys, but infront of you? jeez, these are children!

The no sex thing... omg whats his problem?! some women are put off sex for months & months after giving birth.
He needs to stop concentrating on his dick, and start concentrating on raising the newest member of the family.

[LadieNisha4u2nv]

I think that's part of why I was so upset. I was hoping he would stand up to them and tell them that he wouldn't die without sex for a while. But he didn't. So I started questioning if he felt the same way as them and didnt tell me since he knows I'd put him in his place and most likely tell him to **** off if he told me what they told me.

[starbuck]

I think you have every right to be upset! You just had a baby for crying out loud. It's a major strain on the body and you need to heal.

I'm sorry that your boyfriend and friends are being unsupportive I agree with Eco. Your sex life with him is none of their business and they should be told that if they bring it up.

[vashti]

Why is everyone discussing your sex life in the first place? Ugh. No boundaries.

Nisha, you do NOT need to get knocked up again. YOu are practically a baby yourself. Tell your man if he can't wait to hit the road. You should be on the pill before his penis comes anywhere near your snatch.