Boyfriend won't post about us on social media?

[lm0905]

So I've been with my boyfriend since December. He really is so amazing and is my best friend. He has never given me a reason to not trust him, but for some reason this has been bothering me.

But, my boyfriend just won't post any pictures of us two on his Instagram page. We have been on a few trips together where he has posted pictures of the scenery and will 'tag' me in them, but won't post pics of just the two of us.

When I asked him about it, he said 'I just don't feel the need to. Everybody that is important to me in my life knows about you and has met you so I don't find it a big deal'... Which is true, I have met all of his friends and have hung out with them numerous times.

I have posted a few pictures of my boyfriend and I on Instagram, and tagged him, but he has never hid the tag on his profile and he doesn't mind that I post pictures. He has also posted videos and pictures of me on Snapchat.

But he went away this weekend and posted a picture of him and his 2 best friends (which he has on numerous times), so I don't know why it is bothering me so much.
Like all of his friends know me, but I just find it odd/strange that he refuses to post pictures of us on Instagram... Is it sketchy that he won't? Because it feels like I should be worried. Almost like he is trying to have this 'bachelor lifestyle' on Instagram where he looks single and his this great life.

I know i'm probably worried about nothing, but I'd just like some third party opinions

[DarkHunter]

I have the same thing with my girlfriend... however it's distance relationship

Well we've going out for 4 months and I posted a picture of us after 1 month and tagged her, she didn't really say anything.

After 3 months I visitied her and asked her why is she not taking any pictures or posting something online and she says that she doesn't want it and that she doesn't feel comfortable with it.

I know that all of her closer friends know that we are together and I met all of them.

It bothers me a lot since we are in a long distance realtionship and I want her to post at least one picture of us so that if someone starts talking to her he will know that she has a boyfriend...but I guess that means I was having trust issues, I'm understanding her now that just not everyone needs to know.

[MortensOrchid]

Ah, where were we before social media? We didn't have this problem not too long ago, did we? Ha ha ha ... But that aside ...

If he says he is not comfortable posting photos of the two of you on social media, you do have a right to ask why. He gave his answers (that people don't need to know too much about what is/isn't happening with him), but have you ever considered something else? Chances are he may have had a past experience and been badly hurt by it so he is practicing more caution about his love life as it pertains to others seeing evidence of it.

Also how long have you two been together? If you are fresh into the relationship then you should practice caution and not make things public (be it introducing them to friends/family or posting photographic/verbal evidence of it on social media) until a bit of time has passed. My rule now is about three/four months. Why? Because if and when you introduce them to the outside world something not good happens. The friends/family assumes things about you and that person or vice versa and one doesn't like the other. There could be a lot of different reasons why they don't like each other, but as soon as you make it public in that way it's over. Know how many friends I lost or the tantrums my family threw when I introduced the new bf to them? A LOT. Or how many guys broke up with me (I've lost count how many at this point in life) because they don't like my friends/family? That plays a factor in this.

I wouldn't be bent out of shape about it. I try not to post photos of me and whoever I am with on social media either. I will post photos of me and friends (be they guys or girls) but also keep them at a minimum as well. I have enough fun without them seeing that.

[TheEvilJester]

I too cannot help but muse on the ridiculous world we live in these days. That social media has become such an important aspect of our lives and even impacts people's relationships. Don't get me wrong, though, lm. I do NOT mean that as a slight against you in any way. Believe it or not, I actually do understand why you feel this way. It's one thing if you two had only been going out a couple months and weren't yet serious. Then I wouldn't expect that he would post pictures with you yet.

But, you say you have been together since December. That's around 7 months or 8 months, then (depending upon how early in December). After that long, I can definitely understand why you'd feel like you should be important enough in his life to be featured on his Instagram. All the same, that doesn't mean it IS something to worry about. Some people legitimately are just more private about their romantic life on social media.

Now look at the other facts. His friends and family all know you by now. He has no problem with you posting pics of the two of you and even tagging him in said photos. He will even tag you in his pictures from your trips together, albeit they aren't pictures OF you two, but rather just things/places you saw on the trip. I think those are pretty good signs that would suggest he's probably not doing this for any nefarious reasons. He's probably not doing it because he wants people on Instagram to think he's single.

I mean, again, I say probably because I can't know that for sure. There are some pretty evil scumbags in this world. ...I'm just saying, from the evidence you have provided, I lean towards thinking it is just exactly what he says. So, I lean towards thinking you should, in whatever way you can, just let it slide. Again, I understand why you feel the way you do, and I even understand you can't help that you feel that way. Sometimes in life, though, we have to learn when to go with our gut instincts and when to tell our gut to take a chill pill and instead engage our intellectual side.

There's probably no reason to worry about this, so as best you can help it, don't worry about it. I mean, I suppose if you two wind up being together for years or even get engaged/get married/etc, I'd understand why it would definitely bother you if he still didn't then. For now, though, why hinder what could be a really good thing over something so minor? He posts pictures with his friends. In time, if you two continue to get more and more serious, he'll probably post pictures of you here and there.

Good luck to you.

[richiro]

you have to look at his habits. Does he post ANY pictures of any females on his fb? Yes or no?
Some people just have a rule that their social media is just for family and friends and not romantic interests.

I would not judge anyhing by how somebody manages their social media - although i get why you have the concern.

Instead.. the real answer lies within how he acts with you and when he's not with you if you are declared bf/gf.. Is he evasive? Unavailable? IN real life does he act or do anything that would make you think he's hiding you (youv'e said youv'e met all his real life friends and important people in his life right? do the know who you are? does he refer to you as his gf or "this is Alice"?)

your answer lies there.. not on social media. everybody has their own way of managing their own social media profiles.