Awesome boyfriend BUTTTT..

[incognita]

I have been dating the most awesome man that any woman would love to date. Hes passionate, romantic, responsible ,considerate and just amazing all the way around. He and i were both married prior to meeting each other with our spouses for over 25 years each. ive never dated any other besides my previous husband and he has dated several times nothing to serious with them but his longest was for 2 years.They broke up because she cheated on him. he has met my family and they all think he is very nice accept for the fact that he seems to sometimes make stories up that i Know are not true and they pretty much just sound stupid when i think about it. Hes told my brother and my son stories that they are like , gosh does he really think that we believe him on that one. one story for instance that has just been bugging the hell out of me is . He told my bro that we were out one day and we came across some knuckle heads that started problems and he had told me to leave while he took care of it & supposedly these guys hog tied him and so forth. well , that story never happened. of course my brother asked me and i told him the truth. but hes wondering .... why would he make something like that up ? and i wonder to. should i ask him why he would say that and im almost thinking if i tell him he would tell me no thats not true. i never said that. everything else is perfect and i mean perfect but this has just bugged me. please help

[TheEvilJester]

....That is weird. LOL! If you don't mind sharing (you don't have to if you don't want) can you give more examples of tall tales he has told? Does he tell these ridiculously made up stories to you as well?

I will say, on the surface my gut instinct is to say it is weird/goofy, but not really that big a deal. Some people just like to tell stories. It may just be fun/funny for him. If everything else is great, my gut instinct is to say that this is just a weird, colorful quirk.

Though, there definitely IS a limit to that. If his stories ever border on being inappropriate or crossing any lines, that could be a problem. If he insists TOO vehemently on the veracity of these outlandish stories, that could be a problem. If he shows signs of lying about other things (more important things) that could be a problem. If he actually himself 100% believes these tall tales of his even when they are completely fake, that could be a problem.

So, as an initial gut reaction I say it sounds like it probably isn't that big a deal. He maybe just likes telling goofy stories and part of the fun for him is PRETENDING they are 100% real even when he knows everybody realizes they are 100% fake. But, I would say just watch out that the lies don't cross any of the lines I mentioned or any other that you may feel would make it more of a problem.

Though, if you want to and/or it bothers you enough, you could certainly talk to him about it. I'd say start off as gently as you can, though, almost as though you think he's just being funny. Like, in other words, I wouldn't come at him angrily like "Why the Hell would you tell blatant lies to my family?" I'd more so half-laughing say something like "Why did you tell my family XYZ? Surely that didn't REALLY happen, did it?

Good luck to you.

[madotnw_nihs]

I agree that while these stories in itself isn't a big deal, do you feel comfortable that he isn't lying or making up things that are important. I think most people have exaggerated or told little fibs to impress people, but this seems so weird. Or maybe you are dating spiderman or deadpool....

[Hooo!]

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[incognita]

and yes i have told myself that if thats all thats wrong with him i will take it. he doesnt tell me that he tells them those stories but i know that hes told me he is a milliionaire but he cant spend no money due to his divorce till after this year is over.. i know for a fact that he does make great money but its no were near that. its enough to live comfortably. ive had to buy him stuff when hes been in a pinch and he has paid me back (like fix his car when it was broke) but still i just go along with him that he cant spend any $ . his divorce has been final for over 3 year now so i dont understand why he cant spend any money for even those things. I know he used to own his own company and he sold the business a few years back when he divorced. he doesnt own a home drives an older car. but even with out that i can see past all that and i love him for the respect and love he shows me.

....That is weird. LOL! If you don't mind sharing (you don't have to if you don't want) can you give more examples of tall tales he has told? Does he tell these ridiculously made up stories to you as well?

I will say, on the surface my gut instinct is to say it is weird/goofy, but not really that big a deal. Some people just like to tell stories. It may just be fun/funny for him. If everything else is great, my gut instinct is to say that this is just a weird, colorful quirk.

Though, there definitely IS a limit to that. If his stories ever border on being inappropriate or crossing any lines, that could be a problem. If he insists TOO vehemently on the veracity of these outlandish stories, that could be a problem. If he shows signs of lying about other things (more important things) that could be a problem. If he actually himself 100% believes these tall tales of his even when they are completely fake, that could be a problem.

So, as an initial gut reaction I say it sounds like it probably isn't that big a deal. He maybe just likes telling goofy stories and part of the fun for him is PRETENDING they are 100% real even when he knows everybody realizes they are 100% fake. But, I would say just watch out that the lies don't cross any of the lines I mentioned or any other that you may feel would make it more of a problem.

Though, if you want to and/or it bothers you enough, you could certainly talk to him about it. I'd say start off as gently as you can, though, almost as though you think he's just being funny. Like, in other words, I wouldn't come at him angrily like "Why the Hell would you tell blatant lies to my family?" I'd more so half-laughing say something like "Why did you tell my family XYZ? Surely that didn't REALLY happen, did it?

Good luck to you.

[GLYC]

Read through the stuff. This would be a deal breaker to me.

Lying. I don't even like people that tell white lies. In certain circumstances, okay. But this guy lies about stuff that has no value behind lying behind it. Except it just boost his image, or in his eyes it will (in reality it has the opposite effect)
I know people that are chronic liars, and I can't believe or trust anything they say. It takes a lot of the value out of having a genuine conversation with them.

I need people that are genuine.

[TheEvilJester]

I agree that while these stories in itself isn't a big deal, do you feel comfortable that he isn't lying or making up things that are important. I think most people have exaggerated or told little fibs to impress people, but this seems so weird. Or maybe you are dating spiderman or deadpool....

Naw, she's not dating me. I dunno about Spidey, but I doubt it. Dude's like a frigging boy scout. Doubt he'd lie like that.

LOL! Kidding, of course.... Well, not about Spidey. He is like a boy scout.

and yes i have told myself that if thats all thats wrong with him i will take it. he doesnt tell me that he tells them those stories but i know that hes told me he is a milliionaire but he cant spend no money due to his divorce till after this year is over.. i know for a fact that he does make great money but its no were near that. its enough to live comfortably. ive had to buy him stuff when hes been in a pinch and he has paid me back (like fix his car when it was broke) but still i just go along with him that he cant spend any $ . his divorce has been final for over 3 year now so i dont understand why he cant spend any money for even those things. I know he used to own his own company and he sold the business a few years back when he divorced. he doesnt own a home drives an older car. but even with out that i can see past all that and i love him for the respect and love he shows me.

Okay see, now THAT definitely to me crosses a line. That's different. That's not making up fun/funny little stories for fun. That's blatantly lying, and about important things at that. First off.... he can't spend any money because of his divorce? I call bull crap on that. Especially if he expects you to believe he's a millionaire (which seems doubtful as well). Now, MAYBE because of paying alimony he doesn't have as much money as he will if/when that ends... but to expect you to believe he can't spend money because of his divorce seems pretty far-fetched to me. And then having you pay for things for him with the promise that he'll pay you back. ...Pay you back when exactly? Have you yet seen any of that money back?

The tall tales I was willing to give the benefit of the doubt and say maybe that's just how he gets his kicks. This.... not so much. Are there more big lies like this one? Because this sort of thing is exactly why I was saying that the tall tales don't sound SO bad on a gut reaction.... but are at least cause to be careful. This is exactly the sort of thing I meant by that, that it makes me concerned there are bigger more important things he lies about as well.

[astrologerlove9]

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[astrologerachar]

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[incognita]

Yes he has paid me back . I didnt beleive that he wouldnt have. I personally think that he is just trying to impress me by making me think he has all this $ , hes more in the ball field of $200,000 a year .That i know for sure because ive seen that with myown eyes. he doesnt hide his mail its all and its at view with in reach. but NOt near the million . hes taken me on a trip to Puerto Rico next month for my BDay. at his expense but my point of it all is that he doesnt have to tell those tall tales for me to love him. as long as he doesnt change i wouldnt care if he didnt have a dime. and made 50,000. when hes around my family hes always pays for everything even if its my entire family at a gathering.