Need some advice

[Reverb]

She asked you an honest question. Stop making excuses, and give her an honest answer.

[Fajemeister]

She asked you an honest question. Stop making excuses, and give her an honest answer.

I'm not making excuses, I'm going to talk to her about it in person on Friday when I see her.

I was talking to her last night and she kept asking what it was I wanted to talk about, and she kept guessing at it. I told her to stop worrying about it and just wait till friday. The she says she won't let me tell her cause she knows what it's about and she wouldn't know what to say and then she'd really have to stop working with me cause it would damage our work relationship.
So what do you guys think about this one now?

[Junsui]

Sounds like she might know you like her and doesn't know how she feels about you and is afraid if she tells you she doesn't know it will change how things are between you and then she couldn't work around you. Of course, I really have no clue.

[Fajemeister]

Sounds like she might know you like her and doesn't know how she feels about you and is afraid if she tells you she doesn't know it will change how things are between you and then she couldn't work around you. Of course, I really have no clue.

Now your making me confused, because I don't know what to think anymore. I've just analyzed both sides so much that I am completly lost now.

[Tone]

Hmm. This is the same girl you say sometimes randomly blurts out info of her sex life and guys she's hooked up with?

Well, here's my take on the situation:

You like her. She likes you. You're shy. She's not use to guys being shy. You need to step up to the plate. You say you'd love to date this girl. Then you have to put yourself in the zone. It's clear to everyone, but you apparently, that this girl really likes you. What I think she's looking for when she says stuff like "You can't tell me, I couldn't work with you anymore, etc" is reassurance from you, the man, that everything will be okay. But first, stop with the stupid games. Don't do the "I really have something I need to tell you... you know it's been on my mind for awhile and I just....... well I'll tell you in 3 days. K see ya later, buh-bye!" Once, maybe it could be seen as "cute" but it sounds like you did it more than once to her!

If you wanna be smooth about it, use a line from my good friend, Hayward:

In the middle of some casual conversation:
You: "Yeah, but what I wanted to talk to you about.. well what's been on my mind.. is - well I just heard something about you that makes me interested in gettin to know you more."
Her: "Oh yea? And what's that?"
Look in her eyes.
You: "That you're interested in getting to know me more."
Follow it with a smile.

You gotta be smooth though. And you gotta step up to the plate. You're the man. She needs you to be confident, so she can have confidence that it's worth the risk.

[Junsui]

Tone! That's good.

[shh!]

In the middle of some casual conversation:
You: "Yeah, but what I wanted to talk to you about.. well what's been on my mind.. is - well I just heard something about you that makes me interested in gettin to know you more."
Her: "Oh yea? And what's that?"
Look in her eyes.
You: "That you're interested in getting to know me more."
Follow it with a smile.

I would die of embarrassment if someone said that to me, whether it was true or not. I prefer more a bit more discretion.

[Fajemeister]

I would die of embarrassment if someone said that to me, whether it was true or not. I prefer more a bit more discretion.

I would rather say it differently, thats definately way too bold for me. I mean I would do it, but what if she really meant that she would have to stop working? Then I would of ****ed everything up. BTW, it is the same girl that says stuff about her personal life. And no I have not toyed aroun with her ever like this before. But that is a pretty good way to say it, thanks for the advice Tone!

I really just want to make her admit she has a thing for me. I don't really want to be the one to say I have a crush on you and blah blah blah. I want to just bring up some things she has done in the past that makes it obvious she has a thing for me. It's not that I want to make her nervous, it's just I want her to stop lying and bullshitting to me. So hopefully when she is pretty much on the spot, she will give me some straight up answers. It's not even the answers, it's really her facial expressions, because when I look her in the eye, I can pretty much tell what it is she's thinking and feeling. I know a lot of you would disagree with this, but i really want to do it to her. Theres just so many things she's done that I can get her with.

[Lloyd95]

First off, are you guys in high school or college?
Secondly, she needs to get her schoolwork straight, and it's great that you're helping, but if she's in danger of failing out, she needs to talk to her teachers and let them know she's struggling, and she's willing to do whatever it takes to get her grades up.

I agree with Tone's post. You should have stepped up earlier instead of playing childish mind games by saying "I've got something to tell you, but won't until later." It's like running around saying "I've got a secret, I've got a secret!" That being behind you, I suggest before you see her, tell her what you're feeling. It seems pretty obvious that she likes you, or in the very least she is interested in you.


Say something like this over the phone:
"I like you as a friend, I think you know that. I definitely care about you and enjoy the time we spend together, whether on the phone or in person. I'd be interested in getting to know you better, perhaps in a romantic way, or at the very least, as closer friends. I'd like to take you out to (dinner, drinks, don't know your age) and go from there. Think about it, and let me know what you think when I see you tomorrow."

give it a shot, if she turns you down, act cool with it, you haven't lost your friendship and it shouldn't be uncomfortable. I think she'll reconsider and go out with you maybe once her schoolwork gets on track.

Good Luck!

[Tone]

Good luck with that.. I don't think you guys will get very far, since both of you like each other but no one is willing to be the first to put themself out there, so you guys are going to be stuck until either you get bored of waiting, something else comes along, or one of you gets the balls to put yourself out there and say, "Yes I like you."

If you want to be more discrete about it, why not just suggest going out to get somethin to eat after your studies? When you see her and she asks what you wanted to tell her, just smile and say "I just wanted you to know I really have a good time hanging out with you, that's all." or somethin along those lines. Then say "Hey how about we go grab somethin to eat at <insert diner/restaurant>?" Don't go to like McDonalds or somethin, you don't have to go anywhere fancy but go somewhere you can sit and talk.

You can turn up the heat, without having to say with your mouth everything you're feeling. Actions speak louder than words, right?

[shh!]

Say something like this over the phone:
"I like you as a friend, I think you know that. I definitely care about you and enjoy the time we spend together, whether on the phone or in person. I'd be interested in getting to know you better, perhaps in a romantic way, or at the very least, as closer friends. I'd like to take you out to (dinner, drinks, don't know your age) and go from there. Think about it, and let me know what you think when I see you tomorrow."

give it a shot, if she turns you down, act cool with it, you haven't lost your friendship and it shouldn't be uncomfortable. I think she'll reconsider and go out with you maybe once her schoolwork gets on track.

Good Luck!

I like this method much better.

[shh!]

If you want to be more discrete about it, why not just suggest going out to get somethin to eat after your studies? When you see her and she asks what you wanted to tell her, just smile and say "I just wanted you to know I really have a good time hanging out with you, that's all." or somethin along those lines. Then say "Hey how about we go grab somethin to eat at <insert diner/restaurant>?" Don't go to like McDonalds or somethin, you don't have to go anywhere fancy but go somewhere you can sit and talk.

Also much better.

[Lloyd95]

I like this method much better.

Really? so Shh!,

"I like you as a friend, I think you know that. I definitely care about you..."

[shh!]

No, Lloyd.





haha

[Tone]

Well it might be better for YOU shh!, but I'm tryin to think of this girl and how she is. I think she's looking for some reassurance from Faje.